enthusiastic song. We ourselves are our own
answer to your inquiries.
Let us summon memory again to lead the choir,
while all that is within us doth bless His holy
name. "He spake and it was done;" "He said,
Let there be light, and there was light." He
passed by, in the greatness of his love and in the
plenitude of his power, and bade us live. O eyes
of beauty, how were ye outdone by his sweet
looks ! He was fairer than the sons of men, and
168 THE SAINT AND HIS SAVIOUR.
lovelier than a dream when he manifested himself
unto us. Lying by the pool of mercy, we pined
away with disappointment, for none would put us
into the healing water; but his love stayed not
for an instant, he said, "Take up thy bed and walk."
Ah, where shall thunders be found which will lend
us voices ? where floods which can lend us uplifted
hands ? for we need these to utter half His praise.
Angels, your sonnets and your golden canticles
are poor, poor things for our sweet Lord Jesus.
He deserve th notes which your voices cannot
afford, and music which dwells not within the
strings of your most melodious harps. He must be
his own poet, for none but he can sing himself.
He, knows, and only he, that depth of love within
his bleeding heart, some drops of which we drank
on that auspicious morning of redemption. He
can tell, and only he, the transporting sound of
that sweet assurance which laid our fears to rest
in his own sepulchre. He alone can testify what
he hath wrought ; for, as for us, we were asleep
on the mount of joy ; "when God turned back the
captivity ofZion, we were like men that dreamed;
our mouth was filled with laughter, and our tongue
with singing."* He, our Light, did light a candle
around us ; our " conversation was in heaven ;"
our soul made us like the chariots of Amminadib ;
* Ps. cxxvi. 1, 2.
JESUS PARDONING. 169
" Our rapture seem d a pleasing dream,
The grace appeared so great."
"We cried out in wonder, love, and praise,
" Whence is this to me ? * and what am I, and
what is my Father s house, that the Lord hath
visited me, and brought me hitherto." f Our dark
and loathsome prison still made our garments to
smell of its mouldiness, and this quickened our
gratitude for our deliverance. Like Jonah, fresh
from the whale s belly, we were willing enough
for service of any kind ; all too glad to have come
up alive from "the bottoms of the mountains,"
where we feared that "the earth with her bars
was about us for ever." Never did lark spring
from his cage door to the sky with half such speed
as that which we made when we obtained our
liberty from the iron bondage ; no young roe e er
bounded so nimbly over the hills as did our hearts
when they were " like hinds let loose." We could
almost re-tread the steps of our pilgrimage to sing
once more that song of triumph over a host of sins
buried in the sea of forgetfulness, or drink again
of the wells of Eliui, or sit beneath those seventy
palm-trees.
Dear spot of ground where Jesus met us ! dear
hour which brought us to his feet ! and precious,
lips of Jesus, which spoke us free ! That hour
* Luke i. 43. f 2 Sam. vii. 18.
170 THE SAINT AND HIS SAVIOUR.
shall lead the song, and every hour shall join the
chorus of " UNTO HIM THAT LOVED us, AND WASHED
US FROM OUR SINS IN HIS OWN BLOOD, AND HATH
MADE US KINGS AND PRIESTS UNTO GOD AND HIS
FATHER. TO HIM BE GLORY AND DOMINION FOR EVER.
AMEN."
Hath it been in our power to have handled the
poet s style and measure, we might more fully
have expressed our emotions ; but if our pen be
not that of a ready writer, at least our heart is
inditing a good matter. We close by an interest
ing account of conversion, illustrating its intense
darkness, and its succeeding unspeakable light.
It is an extract from that valuable and interesting
biography, entitled, Struggles for Life. After
hearing a powerful sermon, he goes home much
impressed : " I spoke to no one, and did not dare
to lift my eyes from my feet, as I expected the
earth to open and swallow me. The commotion
of my soul was altogether such as language cannot
describe. I crept to my room, locked the door,
and fell upon my knees ; but no words came. I
could not pray. The perspiration was oozing from
every pore. How long I lay on my knees I know
not; happily, this fearful agony of mind did not
last long, or I should have died. Some hours
elapsed hours like ages ; in which I felt myself
before the throne of righteous judgment, and whilo
the process was going on I was dumb. Had the
JESUS PARDONING. 171
salvation of my soul depended upon a word, I
could not have uttered it. But he who had smit
ten, graciously healed. As if they had been
slowly unfolded before me, there appeared these
never-to-be-forgotten words: THE BLOOD OF JESUS
CHRIST CLEANSETH us FROM ALL SIN.
" I had read and heard these wonderful words
often, but now they appeared new to me. I gazed,
believed, loved, and embraced them. The crisis
was past. A flood of tears rushed from my eyes ;
my tongue was set at liberty. I prayed, and per
haps it w^as the first time in my life that I really
did pray.
" For three days after this I was filled with inde
scribable joy. I thought I saw heaven, with its
blessed inhabitants, and its glorious king. I thought
he was looking on me with unutterable compassion,
and that I recognised Him as Jesus, my Saviour,
who had laid me under eternal obligation. The
world and all its concerns, appeared utterly worth
less. The conduct of ungodly men filled me with
grief and pity. I saw everything in an entirely
new light : a strong desire to fly to heathen lands,
that I might preach the good news to idolaters,
filled my heart. I longed to speak about the grand
discovery I had made, and felt assured that I had
but to open my lips to convince every one of -the
infinite grace of Christ, and the infinite value of
salvation. And I thought my troubles over, and
172 THE SAINT AND HIS SAVIOUR.
that, henceforth, the same scenes of joy and hal
lowed peace were to pass before my eyes, and
fill my heart."
Such feelings are not the lot of all to the same
degree ; but an exceedingly large proportion of the
Lord s redeemed will recognise this experience as
" the path of the just ;" and some who read will re
joice to see here a fair copy of their inner life at
this very moment.
May the God of all grace bring each of us to this
fair land of Beulah, this palace of delights, this
chamber of bliss. Amen.
TO THE UNCONYEETED KEADEE.
FRIEND Thou art amazed at this, for it sounds
like a wild legend or fairy tale. Thou knowest no
thing of such joy; this is a spring from which thou
hast never drawn living water. How much dost
thou lose by thine impenitence, and how poor are
the things which recompense thy loss ! What are
thy delights but bubbles ? what thy pleasure but
sweet poisons ? and what thy most substantial bliss
but a deceptive, illusive vision of the night ? Oh
that thou wert able to judge between genuine and
counterfeit, real and fictitious ! Sure one grain of
right reason would teach thee the superiority of
spiritual joys to mere carnal excitements. Thou art
not so far bereft of judgment as to put any one of
thine high carnival days in competition with the
time of pardoned sin. Thou wilt not venture to
compare thy sweetest wine with that wine of hea
ven which flows into the lips of the sinner who is
forgiven ; nor wilt thou bring thy music into
178
174: THE SAINT AND HIS SAVIOUR.
rivalry with that which welcomes the returning
prodigal. Answer these two questions, we beseech
thee, "What doth it profit thee to sin against God ?
and, What shall it profit thee, at last, if thou
shouldst gain the whole world and lose thine own
soul ? Will a few carnal merriments repay thee
for unnumbered woes? Will transient sunlight
make amends for everlasting darkness? Will
wealth, or honour, or ambition, or lust, furnish thee
with an easy pillow when thou shalt make thy bed
in hell ? In hell thou shalt be if thou hast not
Christ. Oh! remember God is just; and, because
he will be just, PREPARE TO MEET THY GOD !
V.
JOY AT CONVERSION.
" The Lord hath done great things for us ; whereof we a: gkd."
Ps. cxxvi. 3.
love, thou bottomless abyss !
My sins are swallowed up in thee ;
Covered is my unrighteousness,
Nor spot of guilt remains on me ;
While Jesus blood, through earth and skies,
Mercy, free, boundless mercy cries.
With faith I plunge me in this sea ;
Here is my hope, my joy, my rest;
Hither when hell assails I flee ;
I look into my Saviour s breast ;
Away, sad doubt, and anxious fear I
Mercy is all that s written there.
Fixed on this ground will I remain,
Though my heart fail, and flesh decay ;
This anchor shall my soul sustain,
When earth s foundations melt away,
Mercy s full power I then shall prove,
Loved with an everlasting love."
175
176 THE SAINT AND HIS SAVIOUR.
HE who dares to prescribe one uniform standard
of experience for the children of God, is either
grievously ignorant or hopelessly full of self-esteem.
Facts teach us that in the highway to heaven there
are many paths, not all equally near to the middle
of the road, but nevertheless trodden by the feet of
real pilgrims. Uniformity is not God s rule ; in
grace as well as providence he delights to display
the most charming variety. In the matter of con
version this holds good of its attendant rejoicing,
for all do not alike sing aloud the same rapturous
song. All are glad, but all are not alike so. One
is quiet, another excitable ; one is constitutionally
cheerful, another is inclined to melancholy : these
will necessarily feel different degrees of spiritual
ecstasy, and will have their own peculiar modes of
expressing their sense of peace with God.
It is true, God usually displays unto the newly
regenerate much of the riches of his grace ; but
there are many who must be content to wait for
this till a future period. Though he dearly loves
every penitent soul, yet he does not always mani
fest that love. God is a free agent to work where
he will and when he will, and to reveal his love
even to his own elect in his own chosen seasons.
One of the best of the Puritans hath wisely written,
" God oftentimes works grace in a silent and secret
way, and takes sometimes five, sometimes ten,
sometimes twenty years yea, sometimes more
JOY AT CONVERSION. 177
before he will make a clear and satisfying report
of his own work upon the soul. It is one thing for
God to work a work of grace upon the soul, and
another thing for God to show the soul that work.
Though our graces are our best jewels, yet they
are sometimes at first conversion so weak and im
perfect that we are not able to see their lustre."
All rules have exceptions; so we find there are
some who do not rejoice with this joy of harvest,
which many of us have the privilege of remem
bering.
Let none conceive, therefore, that we think our
book to be an infallible map from which none will
differ ; on the contrary, we shall feel happy if it
shall suit the experience of even a few, and shall
break the chains of any who are enslaved by the
system of spiritual standards set up by certain men
against whom it enters its earnest protest. Like
the tyrant Procrustes, some classes of religionists
measure all men by themselves, and insist that an
inch of divergence from their own views must
entail upon us present and eternal severance from
those whom they delight to speak of as the peculiar
people, who through much tribulation must enter
the kingdom of heaven. Thus much by way of
caution ; we now proceed.
The style of our last chapter scarcely allowed us
to ask the question, Whence this happiness ? or if
it suggested itself, we were too much in haste to
178 THE SAINT AND HIS SAVIOUR.
express our gladness to reply to the inquiry. We
will now, however, sit down coolly and calmly to
review the causes of that exceeding great joy ; and,
if possible, to discover God s design in affording us
such a season of refreshing. Those who are now
mourning the loss of the peaceful hours, sweet still
to their memory, may perhaps be cheered by the
Ebenezers then erected, and by them may be guided
again to the Delectable Mountains. Great Light
of the soul, illuminate us each while meditating on
thy former mercies !
I. We shall discuss the causes of the happiness
which usually attends a sense of pardon. The
study of experience is one far more calculated to
excite our admiration of the wisdom, love, aud
power of God than the most profound researches
which contemplate only the wonders of nature and
art. It is to be regretted that master-minds have
not arisen who could reduce a science so eminently
practical and useful into "some kind of order, and
render it as rich in its literature as the science of
medicine or the study of mind. An exceedingly
valuable volume might be written as a book of
spiritual family medicine for the people of God,
describing each of the diseases to which the saint
is subject, with its cause, symptoms, and cure ; and
enumerating the stages of the growth of the healthy
believer. Such a compilation would be exceed-
JOY AT CONVERSION". 179
ingly interesting, and its value could scarcely be
estimated. In the absence of such a guide, let us
continue our musings by the help of such little ex
perience as we may have acquired.
1. Among the many things which contribute to
the ravishing sweetness of our first spiritual -joy,
we must mention the case wherein it found us. "We
were condemned by God and by our conscience,
and harassed by fears of the immediate execution
of the wrath of God upon us. We were exercised,
both day and night, by sorrows for the past and
forebodings of the future ; impending destruction
prevented sleep, and the sense of guilt made life a
burden. " When," says one, " the usual labours
of the day required that I should sleep, and my
body, toiled and wasted with the disquiet of my
mind, made me heavy, and urged it more, yet I
was afraid to close my eyes lest I should awaken in
hell ; and durst not let myself sleep till I was by a
weary body beguiled into it, lest I should drop into
the pit before I was aware. Was it any wonder
then that the news of pardon and forgiveness was
sweet to one in such a case whereby I was made
to lie down in safety, and take quiet rest, while
there was none to make me afraid ? For so He
giveth his beloved sleep. " * It is but natural that
rest should be exceeding sweet after such a period
* Halyburton.
180 THE SAINT AND HIS SAVIOUR.
of disquietude. We expect that the sailor will ex
hibit his joy in no ordinary manner when, at last,
after a weary and tempestuous voyage, he puts his
foot upon his native shore. We did not wonder
when we heard of festivities in the islands of the
West among the slaves who were declared free for
ever. We do not marvel at the shouts of soldiers
who have escaped the hundred hands of death in
the day of battle. Shall we then make it a matter
of surprise when we behold justified men exulting
in their liberty in Jesus, and their escape from fear
ful perdition ? We think it but in the ordinary
course of things that when, like the Psalmist, we
have received answers to our prayers, we should
also sing like him, " Come and hear, all ye that fear
God, and I will declare what he hath done for my
soul. I cried unto him with my mouth, and he
was extolled with my tongue. I will go into thy
house with burnt-offerings : I will pay thee my
vows, which my lips have uttered, and my mouth
hath spoken when I was in trouble. Thou hast
turned for me my mourning into dancing : thou
hast put off my sackcloth, and girded me with
gladness, to the end that my glory may sing praise
to thee, and not be silent. O Lord my God, I
will give thanks unto thee for ever." Men put
dark colours into the picture to make the lights
more apparent ; and God useth our black griefs to
heighten the brightness of his mercies. The weep-
JOY AT CONVERSION. 181
ing of penitence is the sowing of jewels of joy.
The poet* sang in another sense that which we
may well quote here
" And precious their tears as that rain from the sky,f
Which turns into pearls as it falls in the sea."
Spiritual sorrow is the architect of the temple of
praise ; or at least, like Hiram, it floateth on its
seas the cedars for the pillars of the beautiful
house. To appreciate mercies we must feel miser
ies ; to value deliverance we must have trembled
at the approach of destruction. Our broken chains
make fine instruments of music, and our feet just
freed from fetters move right swiftly, dancing to
the song : we must be glad when our bondage is
yet so fresh in our memory. Israel sang loud
enough when, in the sea of Egypt, her oppressors
were drowned, because she knew too well from
what a thraldom she was rescued. Shushan was
glad, and rest was in the city, when the Jews had
clean escaped from the wiles of Haman. No Pu-
rim was ever kept more joyously than that first
one when the gallows were still standing, and the
sons of the evil counsellor yet unburied. We may
mourn through much of the long pilgrimage to
heaven, but the first day is dedicated to feasting,
* Moore.
\ " The Nisan, or drops of spring-rain which the Easterns be
lieve to produce pearls if they fall into shells." Richardson.
182 THE SAINT AND HIS SAVIOUR.
because yesterday was spent in bondage. Were we
always mindful of the place from whence we came
out, perhaps we should be always rejoicing.
2. There is given unto us at this period a pecu
liar outpouring of grace not always enjoyed in after
days. The heart is broken it needs soft lini
ments wherewith it may be bound ; it hath been
wounded by the robbers, and left half dead upon
the road it is meet that the good physician should
pour in oil and wines ; it is faint it needs a cor
dial ; it is weak it is therefore carried in the bo
som of love. He who tempers the wind to the
shorn lamb breathes gently on the new-born child
of grace. He gives it milk the ready prepared
nutriment of heaven ; he lays it in the soft cradle
of conscious security, and sings to it sweet notes of
tender love. The young plant receives double
attention from the careful gardener ; so do the
young plants of grace receive a double portion of
sunlight by day, and of the dew by night.
The light wherein for the first time we discover
Christ is usually clear and sparkling, bringing with
it a warming force and reviving influence to which
we have been strangers before. Never is it more
truly sweet to see the light, or a more pleasant
thing to the eyes to behold the sun, than when he
shines with mild and benignant rays upon our first
love. Grace then is- grace indeed ; for then it
effectually operates on us, moving us to hearty
JOY AT CONVERSION. 183
affection and burning zeal, while it absorbs the pas
sions in one object, wrapping us up in itself. So
rich are the manifestations of Jesus to our souls at
that hour, that in after life we look back to that
time as " the days of our espousals ;" so ardent are
we then in love to our Lord, that in succeeding
years we are often compelled to ask for the same
grace, desiring only that it may be with us as in
months past.
Though our head shall be anointed with fresh
oil every day of our life, yet on the first coronation
morning the fullest horn is emptied upon us. A
man may have such a clear and glorious revelation
of Christ to his soul, and such a sense of his union
with Jesus on that beginning of days, that he may
not have the like all his life after. " The fatted
calf is not every day slain ; the robe of kings is not
every day put on ; every day must not be a festival
day or a marriage day ; the wife is not every day
in the bosom ; the child is not every day in the
arms ; the friend is not every day at the table ; nor
the soul every day under the manifestations of
Divine love."* Jacob only once saw the angels
ascending and descending ; Samuel did not hear
from God every night. We do not read that the
Lord appeared to Solomon save that once in vision.
Paul was not for ever in the third heaven, nor was
* Brooks.
184 THE SAINT AND HIS SAVIOUR.
John in the Spirit every Lord s-day. Grace is at
all times a deep, unfathomable sea, but it is not
always at flood-tide.
When we are going to our Jesus he will send
waggons to fetch us to his own country he will
come out to meet us in great pomp, and will intro
duce us to the king ; but when we are safely set
tled in Goshen he will love us equally, but it may
be he will not make so great a point of honouring us
with high days and festivals. Christ will array his
chosen ones in goodly attire, and bind flowers
about their brows, on the day of their union to him ;
but, perhaps, to-morrow he may, for their benefit
and his glory, " plunge them into the ditch, so that
their own clothes shall abhor them." It may be
we have a greater sense and sight of grace at first
than we do afterwards, and this is the reason of our
greater joy.
3. The exceeding value of the things revealed na
turally produces a sense of unutterable delight when
perceived by faith. It is no joy at a fictitious boon
but the benefit is real, and in itself of a nature
calculated to excite wonder and praise. The mer
cies received are discovered to be inestimably pre
cious, and hence there springs at once emotions of
joyous gratitude. He would scarce be of a sane
mind who would not smile upon the receipt of a
treasure which would free him from heavy liabili
ties, and secure him an abundant provision for life.
JOY AT CONVERSION. 185
"When the naked are clothed, when the hungry are
fed, and when beggars are elevated from dunghills
to thrones, if they exhibit no signs of gladness, they
give grave cause to suspect an absence of reason.
And can a sinner receive a royal pardon, a princely
robe, a promise of a crown, and yet remain un
moved ? Can he banish hunger at the King s own
table, and feel the embraces of his reconciled Mon
arch, and restrain his joy ? Can he behold himself
adopted into the family of God, made joint heir
with Christ, and an inheritor of the kingdom of
heaven, and still behave himself coldly ? No ! he
must he will rejoice,
" For should he refuse to sing
Sure the very stones would speak."
It is no small thing to receive a succession of mer
cies all priceless, all unmerited, all eternal, and
all our own. Justification in itself is a "joy worth
worlds ;" but when its attendants are seen at its
heels, we can only say with the Queen of Sheba,
" There is no heart left in me." It is not enough
that -we are washed and clothed, but there is our
Father s banqueting house open to us we are
feasted we hear music a fair crown is set upon
our head, and we are made kings and priests unto
our God ; and, as if all this were little, he gives to
us himself, and makes himself our Lord, our God.
Can a mortal become possessor of Christ, of his
186 THE SAINT AND HIS SAVIOUR.
person, his attributes, his all and can he then re
strain the bliss which must find his heart a vessel
all too narrow to contain it ? Surely sweetness is
only sweetness when we discern Him as our ever
lasting Friend ours entirely, ours securely, ours
eternally.
" Known and unknown, human, divine !
Sweet human hand, and lips, and eye,
Dear heavenly friend thou canst not die,
MINE, MINE for ever, ever MINE !" *
Truly, the believer might be excused if at the first
recognition of the Redeemer as his own, own
Friend, he should become sick of love, or faint with
overflowing happiness. Rhoda opened not the
gate for gladness when she heard Peter s voice ;
who shall wonder if the believing penitent should
behave like one who is in a dream, and should lay
himself under the imputation of madness ! Con
ceive the rapturous delights of the sailors of Colum
bus when they hailed the land, or their beaming
countenances when they found it to be a goodly
country, abounding with all wealth ; picture the
heroic Greeks when from the mountain-tops they saw
the flood which washed their native shore, and
shouted "The sea! the sea!" and you may then
look on another scene without wonder a company
of pardoned sinners, singing with all their heart
* In Memoriam.
JOY AT CONVERSION. 187
and soul and strength the praise of One who
hath done great things for them, whereof they are
glad.
4. At this season the spirit lives nearer to its
God, and thus it dwells nearer heaven. The things
of the world have less power to charm us when we
have but lately proved their vanity ; the flesh hath
scarcely ceased to smart with the pain caused by