Emma Florence Cunliffe.

Southern accent, Sept. 2008-Apr. 2009 (Volume v.64) online

. (page 42 of 63)
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or photos.








Adam Wamack

Humor Editor

[email protected]

Confessions of a network addict

Adam Wamack
Humor Eohor

I did it again today. I told
myself I wasn't going to, but
I did it again. It all started at
the beginning of last semester,
the beginning of the school
year. I was new on campus; I-
didn't know many people, but
I was sure of my social skills.
I met my roommate and he
knew quite a few people more
than I did, so I started hang-
ing out with him and a few of
his friends in the dorm. It was
through him that I met Joe.
Joe was an mteresting individ-
ual. By all technicality, I think,
he was enrolled for classes but
it had been months since any
of his friends could remember
him having left his room, LET
ALONE having gone to class-
es. He ate ramen, slept a lot
and had an addiction— an ad-
diction that sounds so simple
to talk about, but I can assure
you, it was very serious. He
was addicted to the network.
Thousands, millions, possibly
billions of movie, music, data,
software and any other com-
puter-techy files all at the click
of a button... oh I assure you,
the addiction is real.

I remember it quite vividly,

actually, the moment that I
knew I had a problem with the
network. I was studying for a
big American history exam-
going over these dates that
did nothing but jumble them-
selves together in my head
with no possibility of coming
out coherently and in the right
order-and I was really not
feeling it. I couldn't concen-
trate, and when my roommate
called me up on the cell, I was
none too hesitant in answer-
ing, craving any human inter-
action I could get. That was
when he posed the question,
"Do you want to come over to
Joe's room and watch a mov-
ie?" I had a very clear decision
to make: To be responsible
and study (as I knew I should),
or to be irresponsible and
zone out in front of a lovely 17"
monitor and lose myself in a
two-hour plot that I was sure
to do nothing but critique for
the next few days.

So many things rolled
through my head at that ex-
act moment: My teacher's
face, in the middle of a— trust
me-INTERESTTNG lecture, I
assure you; my dad's face, tell-
ing me to be responsible and
not waste my time; my mom's
face, full of innocent curiosity

as she asked, "But do you have
time for a movie?"; the last e-
mail printout progress report
from my class... you know, the
type you immediately delete
and try to forget. And yet the
movie called to me; it called to
me in an oh-so-familiar voice
that caresses the mind away
from responsibility and down
the slippery slope of self-in-
dulgent entertainment.

Boy I wish
there was
a list of
things that
I should do
in my free

And today was no differ-
ent: Two movies, three epi-
sodes, and four music videos;
My name is Every Dorm Stu-
dent and I have a problem.
My grades suffer, my health
suffers, my relationships suf-
fer and I'm gaining weight...
I need help. Boy I wish there
was a list of productive things
that I should do in my free

What to do with your free time

Adam Wamack
Hiimob Cnimi —

Read a real book, and if

that's not your cup of tea, then
read a magazine article. But
the fact is that when you read
someone else's words, wheth-
er they be classics from lit-
erature or new nail tips or the
latest workout that is "going to
get you ripped fast," you are
reaching out of your own box
and learning about something.
Getting out of your own head
is good now and then.

Write a letter to a friend

or parent or whoever. There
is just something about sit-
ting down and putting real ink
on real paper with a real pen
that has such a more personal
and sentimental effect that e-
mail cannot offer. When was
the last time that you ever re-
ceived such a letter? Would be
nice, huh?

Study. Sorry, I had to say
it. I mean let's be real: What
would a "productive things
you should do" list be if I
didn't at least mention study-
ing? It may be worthy of con-
sideration, too... just throwing

that out there.

Exercise. It won't be for
too long that you have free ac-
cess to such a nice facility as
the wellness center and you
know you should. All those
plans you made to work out?
Even if you haven't been keep-
ing them like you said you
would (we all struggle) you
should still go.

If you make it through
that list, then go divulge your
thirsting eyes and watch some
network stuff, but only then!


Parking wherever you want
on the weekend.

It's way too risky during the week, but
on the weekend I love being able to park
in front of Talge and Thatcher without
worry of having to be "saved" from Cam-
pus Safety security.

No bathrooms on the first floor £-_
of Mable Wood Hall. \-

Allthe music majors would love it if they didn 't TT|
have to go to the second floor to use the bath- \_
room in the middle of their practice sessions.
(Submitted by: Timothy McFeeters)

The food at the Super Bowl
parties on Sunday.

Chips, mild salsa, caffeine-free Coca-
Cola, vegan cheese pizza on one side
of the table; chips, HOT salsa, regular
Coke, three buckets of24-piece chick-
en, seven different dipping sauces and
two large pizzas with the works on the
other side... orhotdogs and Chex Mix.
Take your pick.

All the menu corrections posted £_

at CK. Honestly, what AM I allowed \j -

to order? (Submitted by: Allen Clayton) \-

The Southern dorm

*ZlA network. A moment of silence
for the network, please...

Rubrics for writing papers.

The professors hate making them, they HATE >
sticking to them and we hate having to follow
them. Why do we use them again? Whatever >
happened to the good old checkmark on top of
the page with a smiley?

Do all your friends laugh at you? I

The humor pag^needs^oU'

Send all humor page submissions to Adam Wamack. We are loo j
submissions of all kinds— thumbs up/thumbs down, comics, content, e

February 12, 2009



accent.southern.edu • The student voice since 1926

be Lincoln
t-ought to
me at recent

irey Cooper


5 part of a celebration of
bicentennial of President
aham Lincoln's birth,
them Adventist University
sted William Truman Peck
1 presentation on the life of
coin Tuesday night.
1 a nearly full Ackerman
torium, Peck presented
ies spanning Lincoln's life,
uding tales from his hum-
beginnings in Kentucky
mgh his years in the White
lse as the 16th president of
United States,
central theme in Peck's
sntation was the Chris-
life of Lincoln. Hollie Ma-
bber, a sophomore mass
nmunication major, ap-
fiated this aspect of Peck's

1 was interesting to learn
'Lincoln's faith played into
jy aspect of his life," she

^implete with a black suit,
hat and beard characteris-
f Lincoln, Peck specializes
jnging this president alive
fessing like him and giv-
p lectures as if he were
Hdent Lincoln speaking to

see LINCOLN, page 4

Photo By Emily Kay
From left, Jonathan Seard, Julie Fernando, Lu Xu, Hannah Kuntz, Michelle Figueraa, and Ana Medel look at
their pictures during the banquet.

Valentine s Banquet was a royal event

Monika -Bliss


More than 200 students
walked into a royal garden
Sunday night for the annual
Student Association Valen-
tine's Day Banquet at the Chat-
tanooga Convention Center.

Instead of traditional en-
tertainment, such as a show,
students were able to mingle,
take photographs, listen to
string music and enjoy the
company of others in a garden

"I really liked that social in-
teraction was the main source
of entertainment for the eve-

ning," said Ethan White, a
sophomore theology major.

Other students took mat-
ters into their own hands by
becoming part of the enter-

Towards the end of the
evening Cristina Hernandez-
Persia, a senior public rela-
tions major, and Valerie Dry,
a sophomore allied health
major, joined in with Adonia,
the string trio that was hired
for the event. They sang along
with the song "Take My Breath
Away" on stage.

"It was very funny," said
Ana Bedel, a junior nursing

major. "The banquet was so
relaxing that the singing really
caught your attention."

Other songs played by the
string trio included rearrange-
ments of 1980s hits like "Time
After Time" and some of to-
day's popular songs like. "Hey
There Delilah."

During the event students
enjoyed a three-course meal,
raffle drawings and various
booths where attendees could
take pictures.

In all the event was suc-
cessful, but it required a group


Southern bell
choir buys
four octaves
of hand bells

Daisy Wood

Stw White.

By mid-February, Southern
Adventist University's hand-
bell choir, the Southern Ring-
tones, will have five octaves of
bells to call their own.

Lynn Khan, a senior biol-
ogy major and president of
Southern Ringtones, was the
backbone for starting the club
in November 2007. Within a
few weeks of their first meet-
ing, they had auditions, prac-
ticed and played at Christmas
on the Promenade.

For the past year and a
half, the Southern Ringtones
have been borrowing four
octaves of bells from Colleg-
edale Academy and Spalding
Elementary. Because most
handbell music is written for
five octaves, Southern bought
a fifth for them about a year
after the club formed.

With money saved from
a previous attempt to start a
handbell choir and additional
donations received during
Christmas' break, Southern
Ringtones was able to pur-
chase four octaves of bells,
which cost about $12,000 ac-
cording to Malmark, a major
handbell manufacturer.













fampus Chatter








Do you think swing
dancing is against
the "Adventist way?'
Vote online.


Find out more about
this Southern alumnus
and his talent on page




Professor elected ATS president

Stephanie Schleifer

Staff Wbitf b

Stephen Bauer, a professor
in Southern's School of Reli-
gion was called by the Adven-
tist Theological Society (ATS)
to be president-elect for the
years 2009 and 2010.

Bauer was not expecting a
call to this position because
the society usually elects its
presidents from people on the
executive committee. How-
ever, they asked him to be the
president-elect because the
position had not been filled for
the past two years.

"I got the shock of my life
when they asked me to be
president-elect," Bauer said.

According to their Web site,
the ATS is a non-profit, in-
ternational organization that
provides theological resources
for the Seventh-day Adventist
church. Members are able to
"help touch Adventist lead-
ers, pastors, theologians and
lay people with the depth and
power of God's Word."

Bauer said he already has
two projects that he would like
to complete during his time in
office. He is currently work-
ing with a member of the so-
ciety at Oakwood University
to co-sponsor a symposium
(a gathering where scholastic
religious papers are present-
ed) for college students. This
would give young scholars the

Stephen Bauer

opportunity to develop the re-
quired skills with assistance
from professors.

His second goal is to pro-
vide pastoral training for el-
ders and lay pastors within the
■North American Division.

After finishing his two-year
term as president-elect, Bauer
will be the society's president
for the next two years. Ironi-
cally, another professor in
Southern's School of Religion,
Dr. Donn Leatherman, will be
starting his first year of presi-
dency for the Adventist Society
for Religious Studies the same
year Bauer starts his first year
of presidency.

Leatherman said this occur-
rence is "not that shocking"
because many professors in
Southern's School of Religion
are members of ATS or the
Adventist Society for Religious

Thursday. February 12, 2009





Monika Bliss

zack livingston
adam wamack
katie dexter


For all .dverto,^ IKlumeS| ple>se ^ ^ <( ^^^^

Nursing lab enhances experience

Shelby Lambertson

Staff WhiTFB

Southern's School of Nurs-
ing is using a simulation lab
for a fourth semester, allowing
nursing students to practice
realistic scenarios on a life-
sized dummy, SimMan.

Callie McArthur, associate
nursing professor and one of
the simulation lab professors,
said the simulation lab gives
students a safe environment
to engage in assessment and
care for patients and learn be-
fore they are working in a real

"The purpose of being in
SimLab is to give the stu-
dents an opportunity for criti-
cal thinking in collaborative
working environment," McAr-
thur said.

The re-enactment begins
with the professor informing
students about the patient's
health background history. A
student will then ask how the
SimMan is feeling. The simu-
lation lab professor will then
reply to the questions asked
as if they are the patient, giv-
ing the student clues to what
symptoms the patient may be

A monitor in the lab is con-
nected to the dummy and to
the professor's lap top to allow
for necessary changes to be
made to the SimMan's heart

„.„ . , Photo By Triiha*!

Southern nursing student, Suranny VUlamizar, performs a head-to-loeT
assessment on a Sim Man model in Lynn Wood Hall.

assessment o

rate, blood pressure and respi-
ration count.

The SimMan has air
puraped into its lungs from
the compressor through a tube
to show the respiration rate on
the monitor. The dummy's
chest moves up and down,
showing realistic breathing.

SimLab is a "good way to as-
sess and work on your patients
because you can hear the heart
and lung sounds," said Dana
Krau.se, associate professor
and simulation lab professor
in the School of Nursing.

Later, students can find out
what mistakes they made and
what they could have done
better. Fellow students - and
professors then give advice for
future use.

McArthur said the simula-
tion lab is not a class, but more

of a hands-on clinical expert- 1
ence that the School of li
ing offers in various classej
like adult health one and ti
and fundamentals of nursing!

Use of the simulation libi|
growing each semester.
school year tlie lab softwaij
was updated, improving addi-l
tional features such as a toud
screen monitor.

Krysta Moench, a juniij
nursing major who is a simu-l
lation lab student, said it f
nice to see other students {i
ing through other scenarios!
the SimLab, because she a
learn about possible ideas!
may use and what she worf
do differently in the situatk

Moench said, "I like Sin
because it's a relaxing envii
ment to practice procediB
It's not stressful."

New registration process to be more user-friendlj

Jason Busch

Staff Wbitfh

Information Systems is
working to redesign South-
ern's registration process,
which is expected to be com-
pleted by April.

Herdy Moniyung, associate
director of Information Pro-
cessing, said the new registra-
tion is "still the same concept,
but more user-friendly."

This process is still in devel-
opment and subject to change
between now and its launch
date, but will have a variey of
new features. The "shopping
cart" will allow students to ser

lect courses they want by click-
ing the "add to cart" button;
they are then deposited in the
student's cart.

There's also a new keyword
search function. It searches by
course title, teacher or terms
like "economics" or "family."

Students are pleased with
the changes.

Michael Norvill, a senior
secondary education major
said, "I'm tired of having to
scroll through a giant list look-
ing for my classes."

Another new design is the
preview course function. It
shows the student what cours-

es they have in their carta
the books they need for ll
classes. Instead of havingj
print a booklist, the plan iij
the Campus Shop to have J
cess to the course list.

Anisha Mathi, a M
health science major, is »■
ing forward to this featu»J

"It will be nice not f
for the nearest printer toll
off my booklist," she saiij

Another goal is <°J
several other steps of rw
tion to a different part «j
process. The remain^
will be consolidated i*]
course selection step


h ^ ~ ■ NEWS

porm land lines to be discontinued


Brittany Russeix

I Starting this summer,

Bjuthern will implement a
new wireless telephone sys-
tem that will eliminate the use
of landline phones in dorm


I The new system will en-
lace cell signals in places
■th low connections. Stu-
Ints with cell phones will be
lie to communicate better as
]1 as receive emergency no-
mcations more effectively,
[southern's Information

Bstems department (IS) de-
cided to update the system
gcause the old one had been
Iplace for more than 10 years
mi was starting to have prob-

Rns. Also, many students do
not use their landline, which
Jists Southern extra money.
I "Most residents don't even
e landlines; the easiest way
6 reach a student is by cell,"
lid Kristen Taylor, assistant

lean in Thatcher Hall. "When

you compare the use to the
cost, getting rid of the land-
lines make sense."

In a survey conducted three
years ago, IS found that more
than 90 percent of students
were carrying cell phones.
With this information in hand,
they decided to pursue the
idea of going wireless.

"We had to ask, 'Was the
old system even being used?'"
said Doru Mihaescu, associate
director of digital networking
at IS. "Students and deans an-
swered 'no.'"

With the new system, an-
tennas similar to mini cell
phone towers distribute sig-
nals from Wright Hall. Ve-
rizon and Sprint are the main
carriers improved, but AT&T
and T-Mobile are also future

Anadded benefit of the new
system is that it cuts costs.
According to a press release,
Southern will save on the costs
associated with maintaining
and operating a wired tele-
phone' system while also re-

ducing maintenance.

"The system is zero-main-
tenance, once we set it up, it
works," Mihaescu said. "All
we have to do is keep an eye
on it."

The system was turned on
last month for Thatcher and
Thatcher South, and IS has re-
ported only minor problems.
Talge Hall should have bet-
ter cell coverage by the end of

The new system will most
likely negatively affect inter-
national students who use
calling cards to call home and
students who don't have cell
phones. However, each hall
will be equipped with a land-
line phone for those students
who need them.

"I don't think it's a great
idea, but having landlines in
the halls is better than getting
rid of them all together," said
Amy Pitcher, a sophomore
nursing major. "Only a select
few will need them since most
have cells phones."

Parking fees fund Campus Safety

Sarah Faatz


Book Available on:

jjgMon.com aJasonVanderlaan.com

Students pay $90 park-
ing permits each school year.
Many wonder where this mon-
ey goes.

Students this year have
been billed about $104,000
for approximately 1,400 park-
ing permits. However, con-
sideration needs to be taken
that some students do not
have cars, some students only
purchased a permit for one
semester, which is $45, and
others are only paying the re-
duced graduate student rate.

Also around 4 percent to 8
percent of the fees collected go
to iParq, which is the parking
management company South-
ern has contracted for the
printing of permits and the
use of their parking manage-
ment software and database.

"Most of the fees collected
go directly into our budget,
which enables us to properly
manage parking on campus,
tasked to us by the adminis-
tration of the university," said
Kevin Penrod, Campus Safety
director. "It also enables us
to provide services to those
parked on our campus, such
as vehicle lockouts and jump-

The money Campus Safety
receives from parking permits
is not enough to sustain the de-
partment, even if they stayed
within their status quo with
no growth or development.
They receive other budgeted
money from the university
for the other support services
they provide. New interests
and developments within the
department are funded by the
university as the administra-
tion sees fit.

"With the economy in its

current state, anyproposals we
make to administration must
be well thought out and in the
best interest of the people and
property of the university,"
Penrod said. "On our own,
and with our current budget,
we cannot financially pursue
new interests and develop-
ments without the backing
and financial support of the

Overall, Campus Safety
does not get a lot of money
from parking permits. Howev-
er, some students believe that
Campus Safety has a lot of rev-
enue coming in from permits
and tickets.

However, Campus Safety
has not been giving out as
many parking violations as in
past years. Administration at
Southern has requested that
they give less tickets. One of
the main reasons for this is
to be a more visitor-friendly
campus. They have also given
students a much longer time
period in which to register
their cars, per administrative
request, issuing warnings and
reminders rather than tickets
for the first several weeks of
each semester.

Also, with the department
moving to full-time staff, pa-
trol officers are having less
time to ticket as they focus
more on safety responsibili-

The ticket income budget is
not part of the Campus Safety
budget. The university keeps
this budget at a low figure so
it is nqt dependent on writ-
ing citations to meet budget-
ary needs. Therefore writing
fewer citations has not caused
a budgetary problem for the
department or the university
as a whole.


Continued from Pg. 1


"We had around 15 extreme-
ly dedicated volunteers come
in around 9 a.m. to start set-
ting up," said Luther Whiting,
a sophomore business man-
agement major and executive

vice president of SA. "I really
believe that all of their hard
work paid off.

Emily Fisher, a sophomore
nursing major agreed.

"The social committee did a
great job of making sure that
it wasn't too cheesy. It turned
out to be a very elegant social,
with a great atmosphere."




Repairs allow students back in apartments

Christina McNeilus


Progress is being made on
the Southern Village apart-
ments that flooded due to
freezing temperatures less
than two weeks ago, and stu-
dents should be back in their
apartments by Feb. 14.

Sprinkler system pipes
froze in Maple 3's attic causing
the ceiling to cave in and water
to drain down into Maple 1 on
Jan. 17.

David Wolf, a repair con-
tractor, said Cornerstone Con-
tracting had to replace the
ceiling, restore drywall, take

out insulation and replace
electrical wires.

The eight affected students
are currently residing in Talge
Hall, and Southern is helping
with their expenses.

"They gave us credit to our
bill and we didn't have to pay
rent," Jeff Harper a junior


Continued from Pg. 1

to the audience.

"I love teaching students
about the history of Lincoln
and our nation," said Peck,
who has been doing presenta-
tions on Lincoln for the past
28 years.

Online LibraryEmma Florence CunliffeSouthern accent, Sept. 2008-Apr. 2009 (Volume v.64) → online text (page 42 of 63)