all beyond this would be dangerous weak-
nefs in government : it might open a door to
the wildeft enthufiafm, and to the moft mif-
chievous attacks of political difafteftion
working upon that enthufiafm. If you en-
courage and authorize it to fall on the fyna-
gogue, it will go from thence to the meet-
ing-houfe, and in the end to the palace.
But let us be careful to check its further
progrefs. The more zealous we are to fup-
port Chriftianity, the more vigilant ftiould
we be in maintaining toleration. If we
bring back perfecution, we bring back the
Anti-chriftian fpirit of popery 5 and when
the fpirit is here, the whole fyftem will foon
follo^v. Toleration is the bafis of all public
quiet. It is a charter of freedom given to
the mind, more valuable, I think, than that
which fecures our perfons and eftates. In-
deed, they are infeparably connefted toge-*
ther : for, where the mind is not free,
where the confcience is enthralled, there is
no freedom. Spiritual tyranny puts on the
galling chains ; but civil tyranny is called
in, to rivet and fix them. We fee it in
Spain, and many other countries ; we have
formerly both feen and felt it in England,
By the blefling of God, we are now delivered
from all kinds of oppreflion. Let us take
care, that they may never return.
E:ID of book T3B THIRD,
ELEGANT EXTRACTS,
IN PROSE.
BOOK THE FOURTH.
NARRATIVES, DIALOGUES, &c.
WITH OTHER
HUMOROUS, FACETIOUS, AND ENTERTAINING PIECES.
^ I. The Story ofLz Fevre,
IT was fome time m the fummer of that
year in which Dendermond was taken
by the allies, — which was about feven years
before my father came into the country, —
and about as many after the time that my
uncle Toby and Trim uad privately de-
camped from my father's houfe in town, in
order to lay fome of the fineft fieges to fome
of the fineft fortified cities in Europe — When
rny uncle Toby was one evening getting his
fupper, with Trim fitting behind him at a
fmall fideboard ; — The landlord of a little
inn in the village came into the parlour v/ith
an empty phial in his hand to beg a glafs or
two of fack ; 'tis for a poor gentleman,— I
thLnk, of the army, faid the landlord, who
has been taken ill at my houfe four days ago,
and has never held up his head fince, or had
9 defire to tafte any thing 'till juft now, that
lie has a fancy for a glafs of fack and a thin
toaft. — / think, £ays he, taking his hand
ix;om his forehead, // wjould comfort me.
'— — If I could neither beg, borrow, nor
buy fuch a thing, — added the landlord, — I
would almoft fteal it for the poor gentleman,
he is fo ill. 1 hope, in God he will ftill
mend, continued he — we are all of us con-
cerned for him.
Thou art a good-natured foul, I will
anfwer for thee, cried my uncle Toby;
and thou fhalt drink the poor gentleman's
health in a glafs of fack thyfelf,— and take
a couple of bottles, with my fervice, and
tell him he is heartily welcome to them,
and to a dozen more, if they will do him
good.
Though I am perfuaded, faid my uncle
Toby, as the landlord fhut the door, he i»
a very compafiionate fellow — Trim, — yet I
cannot help entertaining an high opinion of
his gueft too ; there muft be fomething
more than common in him, that in fo fhort
a time fhould win fo much upon the affec-
tions of his hoft; And of his whole
family, added the corporal, for they are all
concerned for him. Step after him, faid
my uncle Toby, — do Trim, — and aflc if he
knows his name.
1 have quite forgot it, truly, faid
the landlord, coming back into the parlour
with the corporal, — but I can afk his fon
again: Has he a fon with him then ?
faid my uncle Toby, A boy, replied the
landlord, of about eleven or twelve years of
age ; — but the poor creature has tafted almoft
as little as his father ; he does nothing but
mourn and lament for him night and day ;— •
he has not ftirred from the bed-fide thefe
two days.
My uncle Toby laid down his knife and
fork, and thruft his plate from before him,
as the landlord gave him the account; and
Trim, without being ordered, took away
without faying one word, and in a few
minutes after brought him his pipe and
tobacco,
Stay
JooK IV. NARRATIVES, DIALOGUES, &c. 171
Stay In tlie room a little, fays my
mcle Toby.
Trim ! — faid my uncle Toby, after he
had lighted his pipe, and fmoked about a
dozen whifFs — Trim came in front of his
matter, and made his bow ; — my uncle Toby
fmoked on, and faid no more. ^ -Corpo-
ral ! faid my uncle Toby — the corporal made
his bow. My uncle Toby proceeded no
farther, but finiflied his pipe.
Trim! faid my uncle Toby, I have a
projedt in my head, as it Is a bad night, of
wrapping myfelf up warm in my roquelaure,
and paying a vifit to this poor gentleman. —
lYour honour's roquelaure, replied the cor-
poral, has not once bee.n had on, fmce the
night before your honour received your
wound, when we mounted guard in the
trenches before the gate of St. Nicholas; —
and befides, it is fo cold and rainy a night,
that what with the roquelaure, and what
with the weather, 'twill be enough to give
your honour your death, and bring on your
honour's torment in your groin. — I fear fo,
replied my uncle Toby ; but I am not at reft
in my mind. Trim, fince the account the
landlord has given me. — I wifh I had not
known fo much of this affair^ — added my
uncle Toby, — or that I had known more of
it : — How Ihall we manage it ? — Leave it,
an't pleafe your honour, to me, quotli the
corporal; — I'll take my hat and ftick, and
go to the houfe and reconnoitre, and aft
accordingly ; and I will bring your honour
full account in an hour. — Thou flialt go.
Trim, faid my uncle Toby, and here's a
fhiliing for thee to drink with his fervant — I
Ihall get it all out of him, faid the corpo-
ral, ihutting the door.
My uncle Toby filled his fecond pipe ;
and had it not been, that he now and then
wandered from the point, with confidering
whether it was not full as well to have the
curtain of the tennaile a ftraight line, as a
crooked one, — he might be faid to have
thought of nothing elfe but poor Le Fevre
and his boy the whole time he fmoked
it.
It was not till my uncle Toby had knocked
the afhes out of his third pipe, that corporal
Trim returned from the 4nn, and gave him
the following account.
I defpaired at firft, faid the corporal, of
being able to bring back your honour any
kind of intelligence concerning the poor fick
lieutenant — Is he in the army then ? faid
my uncle Toby — He is, faid the corporal —
And in what regiment ? faid my uncle Toby
«!<-«i']i leil your honour, replied the corpo-
ral, every thing ftraight forwards, as I learnt
it.— .Then, Trim, 111 fill another pipe,
faid my uncle Toby, and not interrupt thee
till thou haft done ; fo fit down at thy eafe.
Trim, in the window-feat, and- begin thy
ftory again. The corporal made his old
bow, which generally fpoke, as plain as a
bow could fpeak it — " Your honour is
good :" — And having done that, he fat
down, as he was ordered, — and began the
ftory to my uncle Toby over again in pretty-
near the fame words.
I defpaired at firft, faid the corporal, of
being able to bring back any intelligence to
your honour about the lieutenant and his
fon ; for when I afked where his fervant
was, from whom I made myfelf fure of
knowing every thing which was proper to
be afked — That's a right diftinclion. Trim,
faid my uncle Toby — I was anfwered, an'
pleafe your honour, that he had no fervant
with him; — that he had come to the inn
with hired horfes, which, upon finding him-
felf unable to proceed, (to join, I fuppofe,
the regiment) he had difmiifed the morning
after he came. — If I get better, my dear,
faid he, as he gave his purfe to his fon to
pay the man, — we can hire horfes from
hence. — But, alas ! the poor gentleman will
never get from hence, faid the landlady to
me, — for I heard the death-watch all night
long ; — and when he dies, the youth, his
fon, will certainly die with him ; for he is
broken-hearted already.
I was hearing this account, continued
the corporal, when the youth came into the
kitchen, to order the thin toaft the landlord
fpoke of; — but I will do it for my father
myfelf, faid the youth. — Pray let me fave
you the trouble, young gentleman, faid I,
taking up a fork for the purpofe, and offer-
ing him my chair to fit down upon by the
fire, whilftldidit. — I believe, nr, faid he,
very modeftly, I can pleafe him beft myfelf»
— i am fure, faid I, his honour will not
like the toaft the worfe for being toafted by
an old foldier, — The youth took hold of my
hand, and inftantly burft into tears. — Poor
youth! faid my uncle Toby,— he has been
bred up from an infant in the army, and
the name of a foldier. Trim, founded in his
ears like the name of a friend; — I wilh I
had him here.
1 never, in the longeft march, faid
the corporal, had fo great a mind to my
dinner, as I had to cry with him for com-
pany : — What could be the matter with me,
an' pleafe your honour? Nothing in the
world. Trim, faid m^' uncle Toby, blow-
ing
172
ELEGANT EXTRACTS,
Book IV.
ing his nofe, — but that thou art a good-
natured fellow.
When I gave him the toaft, continued
the corporal, I thought it was proper to
tell him I was Captain Shandy's fervant,
and that your honour (though a ftranger)
was extrernely- concerned for his father ; —
and that ii'there was any thing in your houfe
or cellar — (and thou might'll have added
my purfe too, faid my uncle Toby) he was
heartily welcome to it: — he made a very
low bow, (which was meant to your ho-
nour) but no anfwer,— for his heart was full
— fo he went up ftairs with the toaft : — I
warrant you, my dear, faid I, as I opened
the kitchen-door, your father will be well
again. — Mr. Yorick's curate was fraokinga
pipe by the kitchen hre — but faid not a word
good or bad to comfcrt the youth. 1
thought it was wrong, added the corporal
• 1 think fo too, faid my uncle Toby.
When the lieutenant had taken his glafs
of fack and toaft, he felt himfelf a little re-
vived, and fent down into the kitchen, to
let me know, that in about ten minutes he
Ihould be glad if I would ftep up ftairs.— -I
believe, faid the landlord, he is going to
fay his prayers, — for there was a book laid
upon the chair by his bed-fide ; and as I
ihut the door I faw his fon take up a
cufhion.-^
I thought, faid the curate, that you gen-
tlemen of the army, Mr. Trim, never faid
your prayers at all. 1 heard the poor
gentleman fay his prayers laft night, faid
the landlady, very devoutly, and with my
own ears, or I could not have believed it. —
Are you fure of it ? replied the curate :-
A foldier, an' pleafe your reverence, faid I,
prays as often (of his own accord) as apar-
fon-; — and when he is fighting for his king,
and for his own life, and for his honour too,
he has the moft reafon to pray to G-od of any
one in the whole world. — 'Twas well faid
of thee. Trim, faid my uncle Toby. — But
when a foldier, faid I, an' pleafe your re-
verence, has been ftanding for twelve hours
together in the trenches, up to his knees in
cold water, — or engaged, faid I, for months
together in long and dangerous marches ;—
harrclTed, perhaps, in his rear to-day; —
harrafling others to-morrow : — detached
here ; — countermanded there ; — refting this
night upon his arms ; — beat up iq his fhirt
the next; — benumbed in his joints; — per-
haps without ftrau' in his tent to kneel on ; —
he muft fay his prayers how and v/hen he
can. — I believe, faid I, — for I was piqued,
quoth the corporal, for the reputation of ths
army, — T believe, an't pleafe your reverence,
faid I, that when a foldier gets time to
pray, — he prays as heartily as a parfon—
though not with all his fufs and hypocrify.
Thou fhonld'ft not have faid that.
Trim, faid my uncle Toby,^ — for God only
knows who is a hypocrite, and who is not :
— At the great and general review of us all,
corporal, at the day of judgment, (and not
till then) — it will be feen who has done their
duties in this world, — and who has not ;
and we (hall be advanced. Trim, accord-
ingly. — I hope we fliall, faid Trim. It
is in the Scripture, faid my uncle Toby ;
and I will Ihew it thee to-morrow : — In the
mean time we may depend upon it. Trim, j
for our comfort, faid my uncle Toby, that
God Almighty is fo good and juft a governor ]
of the world, that if we have but done our â– ]
duties in it,— it will never be enquired into, ';
whether we have done them in a red coat or ;
a black one : — I hppe not, faid the corpo-
ral. — But go on. Trim, faid my uncle
Toby, with thy ftory. '
When I went up, continued the corporal,
into the lieutenant's room, which I did not
do till the expiration of the ten minutes, —
he was lying in his bed with his head raifed
upon his hand, with his elbow, upon the
pillow, and a clean white cambric handker-
chief hefide it: — The youth was juft ftoop-
ing down to take up the cuftiion, upon
which I fuppofed he had been kneeling — the
book was laid upon the bed, — and as he
rofe, in taking up the cudiion with one hand,
he reached out his other to take it away at
the fame time. Let it remain there, my
dear, faid the lieutenant.
He did not offer to fpeak to me, till I had
walked up clofeto his bed- fide: — If you are
Captain Shandy's fervant, faid he, you muft
prefent my thanks to your mafter, with my
little boy's thanks along with them, for his
courtefy to me, — if he was of Leven's — faid
the lieutenant. — I told him your honour
was. Then, faid he, I ferved three cam-
paigns with him in Flanders, and remember
him — but 'tis moft likely, as I had not the
honour of any acquaintance with him, that
he knows nothing of me. — You will tell
him, however, that the perfon his good-
nature has laid under obligations to him, is
one Le Fevre, a lieutenant in Angus's
but he knows me not, — faid he, a fecond
time, mufmg ; — pofhbly he may my ftory —
added he — pray tell the captain, I v/as the
enfign at Breda, whofe wife was moft un-
fortunately killed with a mufket-fhot, as (he
lay in my arms in my tent. 1 remember "
;he
looKlV. NARRATIVES, DIALOGUES, &c. 173
[le (lory, an't pleafe your honour, faJd I,
ery well. Do you fo ? fiiid he, wiping
is eyes with his handkerchief, — then well
nay J. — In faying this, he drew a little
ing out of his bofom, which feemed tied
vita a black ribband about his neck, and
lifted it twice Here, Billy, faid he, —
he boy flew acrofs the room to the bed-
Sde, and falling down upon his knee, took
the ring in his hand, and kiffed it too, —
hen killed his father, and fat down upon
the bed and wept.
I wifh, faid my uncle Toby with a deep
figh, 1 wifh. Trim, I was afleep.
Your honour, replied the corporal, is too
much concerned ; — fliall I pour your honour
out a glafs of fack to your pipe ? Do,
Trim, faid my uncle Toby.
I remember, faid my uncle Toby, figh-
ing again, the ftory of the enfign and his
wife, with a circumftance his raodefty omit-
ted ; — and particularly well that he, as well
as fhe, upon fome account or other, (I for-
get what) was univerfally pitied by the whole
regiment; — but finifh the ftory thou art
upon : 'Tis finifhed already, faid the
corporal, — for I could flay no longer, — fo
wifhedhis honour a good night; young Le
Fevre rofe from off the bed, and faw me to
the bottom of the ftairs ; and as we went
down together, told me, they had come
from Ireland, and were on their route to
join their regiment in Flanders — But alas!
iaid the corporal, — the lieutenant's laft day's
march is over. Then what is to become
of his poor boy ? cried my uncle Toby.
It was to my uncle Toby's eternal ho-
nour, — though I tell it only for the fake of
thofe, who, when cooped in betwixt a na-
tural and a pofitive law, know not for their
fouls which way in the world to turn them-
felves That notwithftanding my uncle
Toby was warmly engaged at that time in
carrying on the fiege of Dendermond, pa-
rallel with the allies, who prefTed theirs on
fo vigorouOy that they fcarce allowed him
time to get his dinner that neverthelefs
he gave up Dendermond, though he had
already made a lodgment upon the counter-
fcarp ; and bent his v/hole thoughts towards
the private diftreffes at the inn ; and, except
that he ordered the garden-gate to be bolted
up, by which he might be faid to have
turned the fiege of Dendermond into a
blockade — he kft Dendermond to itfelf, —
to be relieved or not by the French king,
as the French king thought good ; and only
confidered how he himlelffliouid relieve the
poor lieutenant and his fun.
That kind Being, who is a friend
to the friendlefs. Hi all recompenfe thee for
this.
Thou haft left this matter (liort, faid my
uncle Toby to the corporal, as he was put-
ting him to bed, — and I will tell thee in
what Trim. — In the firft place, when thou
madefc an offer of my fervices to Le Fevre,—
as fickncfs and travelling are both expenfive,
and thou knoweft he was but a poor lieute-
nant, with a fbn to fubfill as well as himfelf,
out of his pay, — that thou didft not make aa
offer to him of ray purfe; becaufe, had he
flood in need, thou knoweft. Trim, he had
been as welcome to it as myfelf. Your
honour knows, faid the corporal, I had no
orders; True, quoth my uncle Toby,
â– thou didft very right. Trim, as a
foldier, — but certainly very wrong as a
man.
In the fecond place, for which, indeed,
thou haft the fame excufe, continued my
uncle Toby, when thou ofFeredft him
whatever was in my houfe, thou fhouldft
have offered him my houfe too : A fick
brother ofticer ihould have the beft quarters.
Trim; and if we had him with us,— we
could tend and look to him : thou art aa
excellent nurfe thyfelf. Trim, and what
with thy care of him, and the old woman's,
and his boy's, and mine together, we might
recruit him again at once, and fet him upon
his legs. —
In a fortnight or three weeks, added
my uncle Toby, fmiling, — he might march.
— He will never march, an' pleafe your ho-
nour, in this world, faid the corporal :
He will march, faid my uncle Toby, rifing
up from the fide of the bed, with one (hoe
off: — An' pleafe your honour, faid the cor-
poral, he will never march but to his grave:
— He fhall march, cried my uncle Toby,
marching the foot which had a fhoe on,
though without advancing an inch, — he fhall
march to his regiment. — He cannot ftand
it, faid the corporal. — He fliall be fiipport-
ed, faid my uncle Toby. — He'll drop at
laft, faid the corporal, and what will be-
come of his boy ? — He fiiall not drop, faid
my uncle Toby, firmly. — A-well-o'day, —
do what we can for him, faid Trim, main-
taining his point, the poor foul will die :
He fhall not die, by G — d, cried my
uncle Toby.
-:The aecufitigfpirify which flew up to
heaven's chancery with the oath, blufhed as
he gave it in — and the recording angel, as he
wrote it down, dropp'd a tear upon the
word, and blotted it out for ever.
ELEGANT EXTRACTS, Book III.
J74
. My uncle Toby went to his bureau,
—put his purfe into his breeches pocket,
and having ordered the corporal to go early
in the morning for a phyfician, — he went to
bed and fell alleep.
The fun looked bright the morning after,
to ever)' e}'e in the village but Le Fevre's
and his afflicicd fon's; the hand of death
prefs'd hea\ )' upon his eye-lids, — and hardly
could the wheel at the ciftern turn round its
circle, — ^when my uncle Toby, who had rofe
np an hour before his wonted time, entered
the lieutenant's room, and without preface
or apology fat himfelf down upon the chair,
by the bed-fide, and independently of all
modes and cuftoms opened the curtain in the
manner an old friend and brother officer
would have done it, and afked him how he
^idj — how he had refted in the night, —
what was his complaint, — where was his
pain, — and what he could do to help him ?
and without giving him time to anfwer
any one of the enquiries, went on and told
him of the little plan which he had been
concerting with the corporal the night be-
fore for him. —
You ftiall go home direftly, Le
Fevre, faid my uncle Toby, to my houfe,
and we'll fend for a doAor to fee what's the
matter, — and we'll have an apothecary, —
and the corporal fhall be your nurfe; — and
I'll be your fervant, Le Fevre.
There was a franknefs in my uncie Toby,
—not the efFeft of familiarity, — but the
caufe of it, — which let you at once into his
foul, and (hewed you the goodnefs of his
nature ; to this, there was fomething in his
looks, and voice, and manner, fuper-added,
which eternally beckoned to the unfortunate
to come and take fhelter under him ; fo that
before my uncle Toby had half finifhed the
kind offers he was making to the father, had
the fon infenfibly preffed up clofe to his
knees, and had taken hold of the breaft of
his coat, and was pulling it towards him.
The blood and fpirits of Le Fevre,
which were waxing cold and flow within
him, and were retreating to their laft citadel,
the heart, — rallied back, the film forfook his
eyes for a moment, — he looked up wilhfuUy
in my uncle Toby's face, — then caft a look
upon his boy, — and that ligament, fine as it
was, — was never broken.
Nature inftantly ebb'd again, -the
film returned to its place, the pulfe
flutter'd — flopp'd — went on — throbb'd—
ftopp'd again-^mov'd — ftopp'd — fhall I go
on ? No. Sterne,
§ 2. YorickV Death.
A few hours before Yorick breathed hit
laft, Eugenius ftept in, with an intent to
take his lalt fight and laft farewel of him.
Upon his drawing Yorick's curtain, and
aiking how he felt himfelf, Yorick looking
up in his face, took hold of his hand, •
and, after thanking him for the many tokens
of his friendftiip to him, for which, he faid,
if it was their fate to meet hereafter, he
would thank him again and again ; he told
him, he was within a few hours of giving
his enemies the flip for ever. — I hope not,
anfwered Eugenius, with tears trickling
down his cheeks, and with the tendereft tone
that ever man fpoke, — ^I hope not, Yorick,
faid he. Yorick replied, with a look-up,
and a gentle fqueeze of Eugenius's hand,—
and that was all, — but it cut Eugenius to his
heart. — Come, come, Yorick, quoth Euge-
nius, wiping his eyes, and funimoning up-
the man within him,— my dear lad, be
comforted, — let not all thy fpirits and forti-
tude forfake thee at this crifis when thou
moft wanteft them; — who knows what re-
fources are in ftore, and what the power of
God may yet do for thee?— Yorick laid his
hand upon his heart, and gently ftiook his
head; for my part, continued Eugenius,
crying bitterly as he uttered the words, — I
declare, I know not, Yorick, how to part
with thee, and would gladly flatter my
hopes, added Eugenius, chearing up his
voice, that there is ftill enougii of thee left
to make a bifiiop, — and that I may live to
fee it. 1 befeech thee, Eugenius, quoth
Yorick, taking off his nightcap as well as
hecould with his left hand, his right
being ftill grafped clofe in that of Eugenius,
1 befeech thee to take a view of my
head. J fee nothing that ails it, replied
Eugenius. Then, alas! my friend, faid
Yorick, let me tell you, that it is fo bruifed
and mif-fhapened with the blows which have
been fo unhandfomely giv^n me in the dark,
that I might fay with Sancho Panca, that
fhould I recover, and " mitres thereupon
** be fufFered to rain down from heaven as
" tluck as hail, not one of them would fit
«« it."—— Yorick's laft breath was hanging
upon his trembling lips, ready to depart as
he uttered this ; — yet ilill it v/as uttered with
fomething of a Cervantic tone ; — and as he
fpoke it, Eugenius could perceive a ftreara
of lambent fire lighted up for a moment in
his eyes ; faint pidure of thofe flafhes of
his fpirit, wliich (as Shakfpeare faid of
his
Book IV. NARRATIVES, DIALOGUES, &c.
his anceftor) were wont to fet the table in a
roar!
Eugenius was convinced from this, that
the heart of his friend was broke ; he fqueezed
his hand, and then walked foftly out of
the room, weeping as he walked. Yorick
followed Eugenius with his eyes to the door,