end of his half-pike a good way up into my
left noftril, which tickled my nofe like a
ftraw, and made m.e fnecze violently * :
whereupon they ftole off unperceived, and
it was three weeks before 1 knew the caui'e
of my awaking fo fiiddenly. We made a
j * It has beeni remarked, that courage in whatever caufc, though It fometlmes excites indignation, is
.never theobjeft of contempt; but this appears to be true, only becaufs courage is fuppofed to imply fupevi-
I ority : for this o^cer in the guards becomes extremely ridiculous aad contemptible by an z&. of the moft daring
I " Curiofity, which fets him in comparifon with Gulliver; to whom he was fo much inferior, that a b!a(t
! «f the Man-mountain's noftrils would have endangered his life; and if heroifm itfelf is not proof againft
I ridicule, thofe furely arc Lilliputians in philoXophy, who confider ridicule as the_teft of truth.
as z
long
ELEGANT EXtRACTS, Book IV.
allowed me to creep in, and lie at my full
length in the temple.
CHAP. II.
The emperor of Lilliput, attended hy fe'veral of"
the nobility, comes to fee the author tn his con-
fnement. The emperor^ s perfon and habit
defcribed. Learned men appointed to teach
the author their language. He gains faiiour '"'
by his mild difpoftion. His pockets are fearch-
ed, and his fixwrd and pifiols taken from him*.
When I found myfelf on my feet, I look-
ed about me, and muft confefs I never be-
held a more entertaining profpeft. The
country around appeared like a continued
garden, and the inclofed fields, which were
generally forty feet fquare, refembled fa
many beds of flowers. Thefe fields were,
intermingled with woods of half a jiang *,
and the talleft trees, as I could judge, ap-
peared to be feven feet high. I viewed the
town on -{ny left hand, which looked like
the painted fcene of a city in a theatre.
I had been for fome hours extremely
prefTed by the neceffities of nature ; which
was no wonder, it being almoft two days
fince I had laft difburthened myfelf. I was
under great dimculties between urgency and
fhame. The bell expedient I could think
on, was to creep into my houfe, which I
accordingly did ; and, (hutting the gate af-
ter me, 1 went as far as the length of my
chain would fuffer, and difcharged my bo-
dy of that uneafy load. But this was the
only time I was ever guilty of fa uncleanly
an aflion : for which i cannot but hope the
candid reader will give fome allowance, af-
ter he hath maturely and impartially confl-
dered my cafe, and the diftrefs I was in.
From this time my conllant pradice was, a&
foon as I rofe, to perform the bufmefs in the
open air, at the full extent of my chain ;
and due care was taken every morning,
before company came, that the offenfive
matter fhould be carried off in wheel-bar-
rows by two fervants appointed for that pur-
pofe. I would not have dwelt fo long upoa
a circumftance, that perhaps, at firll fight,
may appear not very momentous, if I had
not thought it necefiary to jullify my cha-
rafler in point of cleanlinefs to the world ;
which, I am told, fome of my maligners
have been pleafed, upon this and other oc-
cafions, to call in queftion.
When this adventure was at an pnd, I
came back out of my houfe, having occa-
fion for the frefh air. The empeior was al*
long march the remaining part of the day,
and relied at night, with five hundred
guards on each fide of me, half with torches
and half with bows and arrows, ready to
(hoot me, if I (hould ofter to llir. The next
morning, at fun rife, we continued our
march, and arrived withia two hundred
yards of the city-gates about noon. The
emp.;ror, and all his court, came out to
meet us, but his great officers would by no
means mifer his majelty to endanger his per-
fon, by mounting on my body.
At the place where the carriage (lopt,
there (lood an ancient temple, eiteemed to
be the largell in the whole kingdom, which,
having been polluted fome years before by
an unnatural murder, was, according to the
zeal of thofe people, looked upon as pro-
phane, and therefore had been applied to
common ufe, and all the ornaments and fur-
niture carried away. In this edifice it was
determined 1 fhould lodge. The great gate,
fronting to the north, was about four feet
Iiigh, and almod two v/ide, through which
I could eafily creep. On each fide of the
gate was a fmall window, not above fix
inches from the ground : into that on the
left fide the king's fmith conveyed fourfcore
and eleven chains, like thofe that hang to a
lady's watch in Europe, and almod as large,
which were locked to my left leg with fix-
and-thirty padlocl^';,. Over-againd this
temple, on the other fide of the great high-
way, at twenty feet didance, there was a
turret at lead five feel high. Here the em-
peror afcended, with many principal lords
of his court, to have an opportunity of
viewing me, as I was told, for I could not
fee them. It was reckoned that above a
hundred thoufand inhabitants cam.e out of
town upon the fame errand ; and, in fplte of
my guards, I believe there- could not be
fewer than ten thoufand at the feveral times,
who mounted my body by the help of lad-
ders. But a proclamation was foon ilfued,
to forbid it on pain of death. When the
workmen found it was impolTible for me to
break loofe, they cut all the firings that
bound me ; whereupon I rofe up with as .
melancholy a difpofition as ever I had in
my life. But the noife and adonilhment of
the people, at feeing me rife and walk, are
not to be expreffed. The chains that held
my left leg were about two yards long, and
gave me not only the liberty of walking
backwards and forwards in a femicircle, but,
keing fixed within four inches of the gate.
* A Jiang is a pole or perch ; fixteen fete and a half.
ready
Book IV.
NARRATIVES, DIALOGUES, &c.
341
ready defcended from the tower, and ad-
vancing on horfeback towards me, which
had like to have coft him dear ; for t^
beaft, though very well trained, yet wholly
unufed to fuch a fight, which appeared as
if a mountain moved before him, reared up
on his hinder feet : bat that prince, who is
an excellent horfeman, kept his feat till his
attendants ran in, and held the bridle, while
his majefty had time to difmount. When he
alighted, he furveyed me round with great
admiration; but kept beyond the limits of my
chain. He ordered his cooks and butlers,
who were already prepared, to give me vic-
tuals and drink, which they pulhed forward
I in a fort of vehicles upon wheels, till I could
reach them. I took thefe vehicles, and foon
emptied them all ; twenty of them were fill-
ed with meat, and ten with liquor ; each of
; the former afforded me two or three good
I'mouthfuls ; and I emptied the liquor of ten
veilels, which was contained in erkrthen vials,
iato one vehicle, drinking itofi-'ata draught;
and fo I did the reft. The emprefs, and
Ij'OL'.ng princes of the blood of both fexes,
' attended by many ladies, fat at fome diftance
1 in their chairs ; but upon the accident that
I happened to the emperor's horfe, they alight-
' ed, and came near his perfon, which 1 am
now going to delcribe. He is taller, by al-
moli the breadth of my nail, than any of
his court, which alone is enough to ftrike an
av/e into the beholders. His features are
ftrong and mafculine, with an Auftrian lip
and arched nofe, his complexion olive, his
countenance ereft, his body and limbs well
proportioned, all his motions graceful, and
his deportment majeftic. He was then fait
his prime, being twenty-eight years and
three quarters old, of which he had reigned
about feven in great felicity, and generally
vittorious. For the better convenience of
beholding him, I lay on my fide, fo that
my face was parallel to his, and he ftood but
three yards ofi:" : however, I have had him
fmce many times in my hand, and therefore
cannot be deceived in the defcription. His
dreis was very plain and fimple, and the
fa'ihion of it between the Afiatic and the
European : but he had, oft his head a light
helmet of gold, adorned with jewels, and a
plume on the creft. He held his fword
drawn in his hand, to defend himfclf, if I
ihould happen to break loofe * ; it was al-
moft three inches long ; the hilt and fcab-
bard were gold enriched with diamonds.
His voice was Ihril', but very clear and ar-
ticulate, and I could diflinftly hear it, when
I ftood up. The ladies and courtiers were
all moft magnificiently clad, fo that the fpot
they ftood upon feemed to referable a petti-
coat fpread on the ground, embroidered
with figures of gold and filver. His impe-
rial majefty fpoke often to me, and I return-
ed anfwers ; but neither of us could under-
ftand a fyllable. There were feveral of his
priefts and lawyers prefent (as I conjeftured
by their habits) who were commanded to
addrefs themfelves to me, and I Ipoke to
them in as many languages as I had the leaft
fmattering of, which were high and low
Dutch, Latin, French, Spanilh, Italian, and
lingua Fra^n-a; but all to no purpofe. After
about two hours the court retijed, and I
was left with a ftrong guard, to prevent the
impertinence, and probably the malice, of.
the rabble, who were very impatient to
crowd about me as near as they durft, and
fome of them had the impudence to ftioot
their arrows at me, as I fat on the ground,
by the door of my houfe, whereof one veiy
narrowly mified my left eye. But the co-
lonel ordered fix of the ringleaders to be
feized, and thought no puniftiment fo pro-
per, as to deliver them bound into my hands ;
which fome of his foldiers accordingly did,
pufhing them forwards with the but- ends of
their pikes into my reach : 1 took them all
in m.y right hand, put five of them into my
coat-:^ocket, and as to the fixth, I made a
countenance as if I would eat him alive.
The poor man fqualled terribly, and the
colonel and his officers were in much pain,
efpecially when they faw me take out my
penknife : but I foon put them out of fear ;
for, looking mildly, and immediately cut-
ting the firings he was bound with, I fet
him gently on the ground, and away he ran.
I treated the reft in the fame manner, takmg
them one by one out of my pocket; and i
obferved both the foldiers and people were
high; ; delighted at this mark of my cle-
mency, which was reprefented very much
to my advantage at court.
Towards night 1 got, with fome difficulty
into my houfe, where I lay on the grcand,
and contmued to do fo about a fortnight ;
during which time the emperor gave orders
* The mafculine ftrength of features, which Gulliver could not fee, till he laid his face upon the
ground, and the awful fuperiority of ftature in a being, whom he held in his hand ; the helmet, the
plume, and the fword, are a fine reproof of human pride ; the objefts of which are trifling diltinCtions,
whether of perfon or rank; the ridiculous parade and ofteatation of a pigmy ; which derive not only
their origin, but their ufe, from the folly, weaknefs, and imperfettion of ourfelves and others.
23 f
542
ELEGANT EXTRACTS,
Book IV.
to have a bed prepared for me. Six hun-
dred beds * of the common' meafure were
brought in carriages, and worked up in my
houfe ; an hundred and fifty of their beds,
fewn together, made up the^ breadth and
length ; and thefe were four doubled, which
however kept me but indifferently from the
hardnefs of the floor, that was of fmooth
ilone. By tlie fame computation they pro-
vided me with fheet?, blankets, and cover-
lets, tolerable enough for one who had been
fo long inured to hardfhips.
As the news of my arrival fpread through
the kingdom, it brought prodigious num-
bers of rich, idle, and curious people to fee
xnc ; fo that the villages were al moll: emp-
tied; and great negleft of tillage and houfe-
hold affairs muft have enfued, if his impe-
.rial majefty had not provided, by feveral
proclamations and orders of Hate, againft
this iuconveniency. He directed, that thofe
who had already beheld me, lliould return
â– home, and not prefume to come within fifty
yards of my hcufe without licence from
court; whereby the fecretaries of ftate got
con'fiderable fees.
In the mean time the emperor held, fre-
quent councils, to debate what courfe fhould
be taken with me ; and I was afterwards
affured by a particular friend, a perfon of
great quaiitv, who was as much in the fe-
cret as any, that the court was under many
difhcukxes concerning me. They appre-
hended m.y breaking loofe ; that 'my diet
would be very expenfive, and might caufe
a famane. Sometimes they determir -d to
ftarve me, or at leail: to fhoot me in the
face and hands with poifoned arrows, which
would foon difpatch me; but again they
confidered, that the ftench of fo large a
carcaie might produce a plague in the me-
tropolis, and probably fpread through the
whole kingdom. In the midft of thefe
confultations, feveral officers of the army
went to the door of the great council-cham-
ber, and two of them being admitted, gave
an account of my behaviour to the fix cri-
minals above mentioned, which made fo fa-
vourable an impreffion in the breaft of his
majefty, and the whole board, in my be-
half, that an imperial commiffion was iipjed
out,^ obliging all the villages nine hundred
yarcls_ round the city to deliver in every
mormng fix beeves, forty fheep, and other
viduals, for my fultenarice ; together with
=» proportionable quantity of bread, and
wine, ,and other liquors ; for the due pay-
. * Gulliver has, obfervcd'grcr.t exaftnefs in the
^eflened. Orre&y,
ment of which his majefty gave afllgnments
upon his treafury. For this prince lives
chiefly upon his own demefnes, feldom, ex-
cept upon great occafions raifing any fubfidies-
upon his fubjeifts, who are bound to attend
him in his wars at their own expence. An
eRabliihment w^s alfo made of fix hundred
perfons to be my domefliics, vho had board-
wages allowed for their maintenance, and
tents built for them very conveniently on
each fide of my door. It was likewife or-
dered, that three hundred taylors Ihou'd
make me a fuitrf cloaths after the fafhion
of the countr^ that fix of his majefty's
gren.tell fcholars fliould be employed to in-
Itruit me in their language : and lallly, that
the emperor's horfes, and thofe of the no-
bility, and troops of guards, fhould be fre-
quently exercifed in my fight, to accuflom
themfelves to me.. All thefe orders were
duly pat in execution, and in about three
weeks I made a great progrefs in learning
their language ; during which tirric the em-
peror frequently honoured me withJiis vifits,
and was pleafed to affirt my mailers in teach-
ing me. We began already to converfe to-
gether in fome fort ; and the firil words I
learnt, were to exprefs ray defire, that he
would pleafe to give me my liberty, which
I every day repeated on my knees. His
anfwer, as I could apprehend it, was, that
this muff be a work of time, not to be
thought on, without the advice of his coun-
cil, and that firll: I muft Iu;»os kehnin pejfo def^
mar Ion empo/o ; that is, fwear a peace with
him and his kingdom. However, that I
fhould be ufed with all kindnefs ; and he
advifed me to acquire, by my patience and
difcreet behaviour, the good opinion of
Ivimfelf and his fubjects. He defired I
v/ould not take it ill, if he gave orders to
certain proper ofiicers to fearch me ; for
probably I might carry about me feveral
weapons, which muft needs be dangerous
things, if they anfwered the bulk of fo pro
digious a perfon. I faid, his majefty fnould
be fatisfied ; for J was ready to ffrip myfelf,'
and turn up miy pockets before him. This
I delivered part in words, and part in figns
He replied, that by the laws of the king-
dom I muft be fearched by two of his offic-
ers ; that he knew this could not be done
without m.y confent and afTiftance ; that he
had fo g'ood an opinion of my generofity
and jufiice, as to truft their perfons in my
hands : that whatever they took from me
fhculd be returned when I left the country
uil proportion and appearances ef the obJGfts thu I ^
^OOK IV.
NARRATIVES, DIALOGUES, &c.
343
or paid for at the rate which [ would fet
upon them. I took up the two officers in my
hands, put them hill into my coat-pockets,
and then into every other pocket about ftie,
except my fobs, and another fecret pocket,
which I had no mind fhould be fearched,
wherein I had fome little neceilaries, that
'l^ers of no confequence to any but myfelf.
in one of my fobs there was a filver-watch,
and in the other a fmall quantity of gold in
a purle. Thefe gentlemen, having pen, ink,
and paper about them, made an exadl inven-
tory of every thing they faw;_ and, when they
had done, defired I woul^ jet them down,
tnat they might deliver it to the emperor.
Tins inventory I afterwards tran dated into
Eiiglilh, and is Vi/ord for word as follows :
Imprimis, In the right coat pocket of the
great Man-mountain (for fo 1 interpret the
words ^inbus Flefirin) after the ftridlefi;
fearch, we found only one great piece of
coarfe cloth, large enough to be a foot-
cloth for your majefty's chief room of ftate.
In the left pocket we faw a huge hlver cheft,
with a cover of the fame metal, which we
the fcarchers were not able to lift. V/e de-
fired it fhould be opened, and one of us
ftepping into it, found himfelf up to the
mid-leg in a fort of duft, fome part where-
of flying up to our faces, fet us both a
fneezing for feveral times together. In his
right waiftcoat-pocket we found a prodigi-
ous bundle of white thin fubllances, folded
one over another, about the bignefs of three
men, tied with a ftrong cable, and marked
with black figures ; which we humbly con-
ceive to be writings, every letter almoft half
as large as the palm of our hands. In the
left there was a fort of engine, from the back
of which were extended twenty long poles^
refembling the palifadoes before your maje-
fty's court; wherewith we conjecture the
Man-mountain combs his head ; for we did
not always trouble him with queftions, be-
caufe we found it a great diihculty to make
him underftand us. In the large pocket, on
the right fide of his middle cover (fb I
tranflate the word ranfulo, by which they
meant my breeches) we iaw a hollow pillar
of iron, about the length of a man, faflen-
ed to a ftrong piece of timber, larger than
the pillar ; and upon one fide of the pillar
were huge pieces of iron fticking out, cut
into flrange figures, which we know not
what to make of. In the left pocket an-
other engine of the fame kind. In the
'Smaller pocket, on the right fide were feve-
ral round flat pieces of white and red metal
of different bulk ; fome of the white, which
feemed to be filver, were lb large and heavy,
that my comrade and 1 could hardly lift
them. In tht left pocket were two black
pillars irregularly fliaped : we could not,
without difhculty, reach the top of them,
as we ilocd at the bottom oT his pocket.
One of them was covered, and iccmcd all
of a piece ; but at the upper end of the
other, there appeared a white round fub-
fiance, about twice the bignefs of our heads.
Witiiin each of thefe vvas inclofed a prodi-
ous plate of fteel ; which, by our orders,
we obliged him to fliew us, becaufe we ap"-
prehended they might be dangerous engines.
He took them out of their cafes, and told
us, that, in his own country, his pradice
was to fhave his beard with one of thefe,
and to cut his meat with the other. There
were two pockets, which we could not en-
ter : thefe he called his fobs ; they were two
large flits cut into the top of his middle
cover, but fqueezed clofe by the prefTure of
his belly. Out of the right fob hung a great
filver chain, with a wonderful engine at the
bottom. We direded him to draw out what-
ever was at the end of that chain ; which
appeared to be a globe, half filver, and half
of fome tranfparent metal ; for on the tranf-
parent fide we faw certain flrange figures
circularly drawn, and thought we could
touch them, till we found our fingers flop-
ped by that lucid fubilance. He put this
engine to our ears, which made an incefl'ant
noife, like that of a water-mill ; and we
conjedure it is either fome unknown animal,
or the god that he worfliips ; but we ar^
more inclined to the latter opinion, becauffl^^
he aflured us (if we underilood him right, "
for he exprefled himfelf very imperfedly)
that he feldom did any thing without con -
fulting it. He called it his oracle, and faid
it pointed cut the time for every adion of
his life *. From the left fob he took out a
net almofl large enough for a fiiherman, but
contrived to open and fhut like apiirfe, arid?-"'^
ferved him for the fame ufe : we found there-
in feveral mafiy pieces of yellow metal,
which, if they be real gold, mufl be of im-
menfe value.
' Having thus, in obedience to your ma-
jefly's commands, diligently fearched all
his pockets, we obferved a girdle about his
waift, made of the hide of fome prodigious
animal, from which, on the left fide, hung
a fvvord of the length of five men ; and on
* Perhaps the author intended to expofe thjs, probable fallacy of opinions, derived from the relations
«f travellers, by ftiewing liow little tiuth need to be mifunJerftood, to make falfchood Ipeclou?
z 4
the
su
E L E G A N t EXTRACTS, Book IV,
the right a baj^ or pouch divided into two in the air. The aftonifhment here was
cells, %ach cell capable of holding three of much greater than at the fight of my fey
your majefty's fubje6ts. In one of thefe
cells were feveral globes, or balls, of a moll
ponderous metal, about the bignefs of our
heads, and required a ftrong hand to lift
them ; the other cell contained a heap of
certain black grains, but of no great bulk
or weight, for we could hold above fifty of
them in the palms of our hands.
This is an ex:i6l inventoiy of what we
found about the body of the Man-moun-
tain, who ufed us with great civility, and
due refptft to your majefiiy's corhmiflion.
Signed and fealed, on the fourth day of
the eighty-ninth moon of your majefty's
^ufpicious reign.
Clefrm Freloci, Marfi Freloci.
When this inventory was read over to
the emperor, he dirt fted me, although in
very gentle terms, to deliver up the feveral
particulars. He fii ft called for my fcymi-
tcr, which I took out, fcabbard and all.
In the mean time he ordered three thou-
fand of his choiceft troops (who then at-
tended him) to furround me at a difliance,
^vith their bows and arrows jufi: ready to
difcharge: but I did not obferve it, for
mine eyes were wholly fixed upon his ma-
jefty. He then defired me to draw my fcy-
miter, which, although it had gotfome ruft
by the fea-water,, was in mofl parts exceed-
ing bri-^ht. I did fo, and immediately all
the troops gave a fhout between terror and
furprife ; tor the fun flione clear, and the
xefl.ftion dazzled their eyes, as I waved the
fcymiter to and fro in my hand. His ma-
jefty, who is a moft magnanimous prince*,
was lefs daunted than I could expeft ; he
order d me to return it into the fcabbard,
and cafl: it on the ground ^ gen'.Iy as I
could, about fix ktt from the end of my
chain. The ne.^t thing he demanded,
was one of the hollow iron pillars; by
which he meant my pocket-piftols. I drew
it out, and at his dtfire, as well as I could,
expreiTed to him the ufe of it ; and charg-
ing it only with powder,* which by the
clofenefs of my pouch happened to efcape
wetting in the fca (an inconvenience againfi:
which all prudent maiiaers take fjjecial
care to provide) I firit cautioned the em-
peror not to be afraid, and then I let it on
miter. Hundreds fell down, as if they
had been ftruck dead ; and even the em-
peror, although he had fl:ood his ground-,
could not recover himfelf for fome time.
I delivered up both nty piftols in the fame
manner I had done my fcymiter, and then '
my pouch of powder and bullets ; begging
him that the former might be kept from
fire, for it would kindle with the fmalleft
fpark, and blow up his imperial palace
into the air. I likewife delivered up my
watch, which the emperor was very curious
to fee, and commanded two of his tallefl
yeomen of the guards to bear it on a pole
upon their fhoulders, as draymen in Eng-
land do a barrel of ale. He was amazed
at the continual noife it made, and the
motion of the mmute-hand, which he
could eafily difcern ; for their fight is much
more acute than ours : he aficed the opi-
nions of his learned men about it, which
were various and remote, as the reader may
well imagine without my repeating it ; al-