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. anft ®tbet IRb^mes




— — The —

Mutual Life

INSURANCE COMPANY,

OF NEW YORK.



RICHARD A. MCCURDY,

PRESIDENT.



Sast Hssets «««> $1,000,0111



GOOD LIVE AGENTS •:• •:.

SHOULD SECURE CONTRACTS
WITH THIS COMPANY

< < Now lor World's Fair Period.



-CHARLES H. FERGUSON,

GENERAL AGENT.

Tacoma. Building, Clnicago.



COMPLIMENTS OF

THE CHICAGO INDEPENDENT

The Life Insurance Agent's

Journal.



JINGLES FROM JAPAN



Other Rhymes



PETER SIMPLE -



CHICAGO:

The Independent Printing k Publishing Co,

1891



-t} 3



^^.1






To the fifty-thousand energetic and intelhgent
fieldworks of life insurance, this little collection
of rhymes is respectfully dedicated,

A poet once with fervor cried —
His verses oft had righted wrongs —

"I care not who may make the laws,
Jf I'm allowed to write the songs."

Peter Simple.



PUBLISHER'S NOTE— The verses of this collection have
appeared in Tin-; CmrA(ir( J nm>''im;\|)i;nt.



Jingles From Japan.



An Adaptation.



As Sung by the Chicago Life Agents.



OPENING CHORUS.

If you want to know whom you see,
Each is an insurance man ;

We are a goodly companee,
With many a fetching plan.

We are men of wit and tact,

For words we've never lacked ;

You're wrong if you doubt the fact.

If you think we work for pelf,
You should our bank books scan ;

We never are thinking of self,
We labor for good of man.

Perhaps you suppose this throng

Can't keep it up very long?

If that's your idea, you're wrong.



A TRUE PHILANTHROPIST.

SOLO : PRESIDENT MIKADO.

A more urbane official never
Did in this land exist;

To no other second,

I'm certainly reckoned
A trvie philanthropist.
It is my very humane endeavor,
To make to some degree.

Each new-fledged plan

Seem spic and span.
A splendid policee.

My object I confess.

Though profits may grow less,

To beat the record of business —

The record of business ;

And make each agent see,

Unwilling though he be.

The advantages of povertee —

Advantage of povertee.

All prosy, dull insurance workers.
Who chatter and bleat and bore,

Must stop debating

And learn rebating.
We must have business more.
The executive application-jcrkers,
Who journey East and West,

Prepared to proffer

A special offer,
They truly are loved best.

My object I confess, &c.



PROSPECTS THAT BUD IN THE FALL.
duet: solicitor nanki-poo and journalist

KO.-KO.

Nank. The prospects that bud in the fall,
tra la,
Give promise of many a risk,
So we'll welcome them great and small,
tra la,
And hope that we'll capture them all,
tra la.
For w^e are persuasive and brisk.
And that's what we mean when we say that

the fall
Is the time when all agents can make a bighaul.
Tra la, la, la, la, la, &c.

Ko-KO. The prospects that bud in the fall,
tra la.
At times do not grow to a bloom.
They become microscopically small,
tra la.
And oft don't appear at all,

tra la.
Leaving nothing but noise in the
boom.
And that's what I mean when I say that the

fall
Is sometimes a season when profits are small.
Tra la, la, la, la, la, &c.



GOT 'EM ON THE LIST.
solo: journalist ko-ko.

As sometimes it may happen that a victim must

be found,
We've got a little list — we've got a little list
Of insurance offenders who might well be under

ground,
And never would be missed — whenever would

be missed.
There's the actuary-philosopher who incubates

new schemes.
And silly ground-floor offerings with which in-
surance teems ;
There's the smooth-tongued special agent, that

Arab in disguise,
Whose predatory calling the local men despise ;
There's the home office amateurs who pose as

journalists,
They'd none of 'em be missed — they'd none of 'em

be missed.

FULL CHORUS.

He's got 'em on the list— he's got 'em on the list;
And they'll none of 'em be missed — they'll nor.c
of 'em be missed.



11



PERPLEXITY.
trio: solicitor nanki-poo, sweetheart yum

YUM AND journalist KO-KO.

Nank. Here's a how-de-do !

If I rebate you,
Then my grocer's bill's not settled,
And my tailor's badly nettled.

They cannot be cut too.

Here's a how-de-do !

Yum. Here's a pretty mess !

Commissions growing less !
Where's my cream and soda water
If he has to premiums slaughter?

Witness my distress.

Here's a pretty mess !

Ko-KO. Here's a state of things !

Insolvency it brings !
" For my paper you must trust mc ;
"This rebating's nearly bu'st me."

In my ear it rings.

Here's a state of things !



"OH, REBATE."
SOLO : journalist ko-ko.

At a desk in La Salle street, a poor little thing
Sang "Rebate; oh, rebate; oh, rebate! "

And I said to him, " Little one, why do you sing
"About * Rebate ; oh, rebate ; oh, rebate ? '



" Is it weakness of intellect, comrade? " I cried,
"Or a rather big bonus, for which you have

tried?"
With a shake of his poor little head he replied,
"Oh, rebate; oh, rebate; oh, rebate!"

He slapped at his chest, as he squirmed in his
chair.
Singing " Rebate ; oh, rebate; oh, rebate!"
And a cold perspiration bedewed his thin hair —

Oh, rebate ; oh, rebate ; oh, rebate !
He sobbed and he sighed and he swore a great

swore.
And then his limp form with a thud struck the

floor,
But this echo came back from the Evergreen
Shore,
"Oh, rebate; oh, rebate ; oh, rebate!"

Now I feel just as sure as I'm sure that my name

Isn't rebate; oh, rebate; oh, rebate!
That 'twas mortgage renewals that made him
exclaim,
"Oh, rebate; oh, rebate; oh, rebate!"
And if you will rebate, then both you and I
Shall perish as he did, and you will know why,
Though I probably shall not exclaim as I die,
"Oh, rebate; oh, rebate; oh, rebate!"



A GAME OF TENPINS.

Ten little prospects standing in a line,

One had heart disease and then there were nine.

Nine little prospects, all first-rate,

One was too old and so there were eight.

Eight little prospects in a sorry fix,
Two had tubercles and that left six.

Six little prospects now remained alive,

Along comes a ' ' special ' ' and then there were five.

Five little prospects at the doctor's door,

One was a light-weight and so there were four.

Four little prospects await a policee,

Albumen showed itself and then there were three.

Three little prospects — things look blue —
Insanity on father's side and that left two.

Two little prospects, all the rest had gone.
Apoplectic symptoms left only one.

One little prospect of all the goodly group.
Policy " not taken," agent in the soup.



" The company's rates are not too high,"

The agent firmly stated ;
But, after heaving many a sigh

The premium he rebated.



THE AGENT.

Who from the early morn 'till late,
And often in the face of fate,
Labors to make his company great ?
The Agent.

Who bears the burden of the fight,
And tries to make the black seem white.
And swears his company's all right?
The Agent.

Who is it has to "hold the fort,"
'Mid evil or 'mid good report.
When dividends this year are short ?
The Agent.

Who is it cuts the greatest swell.
And puts up at the best hotel.
And has the latest scheme to sell ?
The "Special Executive."



Don't wait for clients to come to you.

But hustle.
Don't color your thoughts a cerulean hue,
But tussle.
There's a birth every moment, says the statis-
tician ;
There are hundreds just dying to ioin in your

plan;
So work on and toil on, and get all you can.
Just Ijustle.



NOW AND THEN.

When the record's well completed,

With figures grand to show,
You'll find chance for moralizing,

And an advertising blow ;
Now's the time for reformation.

Send a letter to the press,
And 'mid a howl of execration —
'Mid a howl of execration —

Jog on serenely ; jog on serenely.
Jog on serenely ne'ertheless.

But when autumn leaves are falling,
And competition's strongly grown.

You've no use for moralizing,
Reformation may be blown ;

Then's the time for sharp rebating,
Send the specials to and fro.

And 'mid the slaughter of first premiums—

'Mid the slaughter of first premiums-
Bob up serenely ; bob up serenely.
Bob up serenely— let her go !



Deaths of great men oft remind us,
We can make our own sublime,

If we only leave behind us
Policies paid up in time.



SING A SONG OF REBATE.

Sing a song of rebate —

Noddles full of wiles,
Four-and-twenty specials,

Dressed in latest styles ;
With powers extraordinary.

Prepared to do the grand,
Aren't they a pretty set

To scatter through the land ?

President in home office,

Happy in his dreams ;
Actuary at his desk,

Figuring out new schemes ;
Local agent in the field,

Working hard and brisk.
Along comes a special

And grabs up the risk.



The actuary's a busy man.
His brain is ne'er at rest ;

Each day he incubates a plan
Full sure to prove the best.

The solicitor's a weary man,

His brain is in a stew ;
He has not time to grasp one plan,

Before there's something new.



MASQUERADING.

Things are seldom what they seem,
Reform is often but a dream ;
Tontine's sold as "distribution,"
Records may bring destitution.

So they may,

I dare say*.

Earthly saints may sometimes be
Lacking in sweet charity.
Even "rogues " have pious turns ;
Jealousy like vitriol burns.

Yes, I know,

That is so.

"Stealing" agents may be awful,
Other things are more unlawful.
Bonus plums are tempting fruit,
Strip the tree and kill the root.

That's the way.

Who'll say nay?



Lead oif the well spent nag,

His race is done.
Bring on the colt Reform,

Trim Ninety-one.

Cash in your bonus checks,
New bets now make ;

This race must beat them all-
All records break.



MY COMPANY.

TO J, W. J., CHICAGO.

My company, 'tis of thee,
Champion of Equity,

Of thee I sing.
While rivals snarl and fight,
Thy name is pure and bright.
Sure that thy course is right,

To thee I cling.

Thy plans are clear and just ;
In them I place my trust,

And premiums bring.
Though thou wilt not rebate
Thy printed table rate,
From early morn 'till late

Thy praise I sing.



SOUR GRAPES.

His father "shuffled " at 34,

His ma at 30 and 7,
His brother at 10 saw the golden shore,

His sister at 6 went to heaven.

" Insurance is a frightful bore,
" More rotten than suspected."

Solicitors now pass his door,
Because he's been rejected.



OH ! LISTEN TO THIS TALE OF WOE.

A bonus plum I had in view.

Listen to my tale of woe !
I watched my record as it grew,
And every agent in Chicago knew
About my record and the bonus, too ;
They grew.

Listen to my tale of woe !

To make a record and bonus, too—

Listen to my tale "of woe !
I on renewals strongly drew,
And to my men I put the screw,
But lost their love and bonus, too ;
Boo hoo !

Listen to my tale of woe !



BEFORE AND AFTER TAKING.

SUSPENSE.

Oh ! that moment of all moments—
Keenly felt, but not defined —

When the policy's accepted,
But the check is not yet signed.

CONSUMMATION.

Oh ! the ecstacy of feeling ;

Oh ! the triumph in your breast.
As you gladly make your exit.

With the check snug in your vest.



THE ANGLER.

On a mossy mound he had found a seat,

His feet o'er the bank he dangled ;
Away from the city's blistering heat,

He dreamily sat and angled.

To those at home who were caught in the lurch,

A story by mail he related,
Of how he had landed a thousand perch.

And swore he had not rebaited.



Little applications,
Little policies,
Help to make a record
For the agencies.



ODE TO A SOLICITOR.

He oh'd ! for a bath in the briny deep ;

He oh'd ! for the mountain's ozone ;
He oh'd ! for one night of a dreamless sleep ;

He oh'd that he might yet atone —
But all that he oh'd ! for is not here related.

He owed for the butcher and grocery bills ;
He owed for the clothing he wore;

He owed for his family's gewgaws and frills;
He owed at the bar a long score —
And vainly he oh'd ! that he had not rebated



KISMET.

Extended on his dying bed,
The insurance agent lay ;

The vital spark had almost fled —
His eyes Avere set and gray.

A weeping family gathered round ,
Bemoaned his cruel fate.

A moral can be quickly found —
He died of La Rebate.



Ah, the record is grand for '89 !

But when the sieve's well shaken.
The residue is not so tine —

The policies " not taken."



PROSPECTS OF TO-MORROW.

He sat in the othce and gazed at his list

Of "prospects " great and small ;
He said that to-morrow he'd start anew scheme,

By which he'd scoop them all.

There was one big risk he'd go for first,

He'd talk the twenty -year plan ;
But while he sat and schemed and smiled,

A rival captured his man.



A HOME OFFICE JOURNAL.

A good^'^-goody little sheet,
With pretty illustrations ;

Filled up by grateful widow's tears
And wordy dissertations.

It tells you when to pot your plants
And the average age of man ;

But never shows you how to gauge
An actuarial plan.



The preacher has a generous "call,
And doctors grow in fame ;

The agent has no "pull " at all,
But gets there just the same.



WONDROUS WISE.

There was a man in our time

Who thought he had a plan
By which he could insurance sell

At three dollars to the man.

And when he found reserves were short,

He made a mighty haul,
By grabbing from the surplus fund

Pete's money to pay Paul.



TWO PICTURES.

He entertained at the Richelieu
A large and promising "case; "

The bill on his pocket heavily drew,
But he paid with a smiling face.

Now, since that day and its royal time.

He does not fly so high.
At noon it only costs a dime

For coffee and piece of pie.



Reform ! Reform !

We boldly cry ;
Then stir the field again,

And close one eye.



AS YOU SEE IT.

The editor's a learned man,

As all can plainly see.
His points are bold and terse and strong ;

He's always upin "G."

The editor's a stupid fool,

A lying debauchee.
His mouthings are the rankest bosh ;

His paper is "N. G."



TWEEDLE DEE AND TWEEDLE DUM.

The tontine scheme's an awful sin,

Worse than electrocution ;
But here's a plan on which to win —

The 5-year distribution.

Two and two and one and three,

Each is a separate sum ;
The difference you can plainly see,

'Twixt tweedle dee and dum.



You innocent looking banana peels,
That suddenly make men lose their heels,
'Twere not for slippery things like you,
What would our accident companies do?



THE ...

Chicago Independent

THE LIFE AGENT'S JOURNAL.
VAI,UABI,E OPINIONS OF FIEI/DWORKI^RS.

Chicago, March 12, 1891.
It affords me great pleasure to recommend
your wide-awake paper to life agents every-
where, in each number of which they will not
only find matter of vital interest to them, but
presented in a manner so intelligent and forcible
as to commend it to their thoughtful consider-
ation.

I wish you every success in your good work
for our profession.

Charles H, Ferguson,

General Agent, Mutual Life.

Chicago, A.pril 15, 1891.
I peruse with much interest the columns of
your paper every month and derive much per-
sonal benefit thereby. While I know that many
agents in my department are subscribers, I can
sincerely say that I wish each one was.
I send best wishes for your success in every way .
G. E. Tarbell,
Resident Secretary, Equitable Life



One Facf IS
Worth ^L Thousand



Th.



THE Twenty-Tear Tontine policies of tlie Equitable Life
Assurance Society maturiug^ in 1891 return the poll
cyliolder all the premiums paid, and the following rates
of interest on the premiums which have been paid during^
the twenty years, in addition to the assurance of his life
during the entire period:

20-TEAR ENDOWMENTS.

A RETURN IN CASH OF ALL TKEMU'MS
AGE. WITH INTEREST AT THE RATE OF

35 6% %

45 6% fo

55 8 %

LIFE RATE,

TONTINK PERIOD TERMINATING at the END OF 20 YEARS.

A RETURN IN CASH OF ALL PREMIUMS
AGE, WITH INTEREST AT THE RATE OF

35 2% %

45 3V2 %

55 51/2 %

The return on other kinds of policies is in proportion

depending upon the kind of policy and the premiums paid.

There is no assurance extant in any company which

compares with tliis. The Equitable is the strongest

company in tlie World and transacts the largest business.

ASSETS, $125,000,000. SURPLUS, $25,000,000.

I desire to secure a few more lirst-class agents, under
liberal contracts, for Illinois, Wisconsin and Nebraska.

GAGE E. TARBELL,

RESIDENT SECRETARY,

Chamber of Commerce Building, CHICAGO.



VALUABLE OPINIONS OF FIELDWORKERS.

Chicago, March 25, 1891.
We like the paper because you are independ-
ent and do not hesitate to criticise and show up
objectionable things and features which are
detrimental to the life insurance business. You
come nearer being an agents' medium than any
journal we know. We are glad to know that
success has been yours and wish you still greater
prosperity for the future. We think that every
life man should read The Independent.
Moore & Riggs,
General Agents. Equitable Life.

Chicago, March 17, 1891.
I consider your journal one of true merit, in
which is recorded much matter which is of
great value to the fieldworker. My men in-
quire for it before the monthly number comes,
which shows that they are interested in its con-
tents. I «an cheerfully recommend it as a good
journal for the solicitor to read.

W. D. Wyman,
Manager, Berkshire Life.

Chicago, March 18, 1891.
I welcome The Chicago Independent every
month. As it "is a journal solely devoted to life
insurance, it is of special interest to agents.

W. N. Sattley,
Manager, Manhattan Life.



« HOW BIG?
5!" HOW STRONG?



The Home Lite Insurance Goinpany

OF NEW YORK

HAS OVER $126 OF ASSETS

TO SECURE EVERY $100 OF LIABILITIES

Its New Policy Contracts arc Attractive, Easily
Explained and Quickly Sold

PROFITABLE AGENCY CONTRACTS

in promising territory, am he secured by active men of good
reputation. Apply to



W A NEWELL



General Manager Western Department,
Home Itisuraiivc lUiililin^-, Vi li I Vi A VJ " ^



VALUABLE OPINIONS OK FIELDWORKKUS.

Chicago, March 12, 1891.
Please call upon me at your earliest conveni-
ence, as I wish to renew the subscription list of
our agents, who have remitted directly to me,
make some changes in the addresses and add
several more names.

I have met all these subscribers since they
commenced reading your journal and they
enthusiastic in expressions of regard for it.
R. H. Eddy,
Superintendent, Union Central Life.

Chicago, March 29, 1891.
Having watched from the start the work in
which your paper is engaged — i. e. the dignify-
ing of the calling of the fieldworker of life in-
surai}ce, and the reformation of the real inter-
ests of our great profession, whether in the field
or in the office — w^e desire to express our appre-
ciation of your efforts and to w^ish you contin-
ued success. Janney & Hammer,

General Agents, Provident Life and Trust Co,

Chicago, March 13, 1891.
Being an exclusive life agents' paper, and con-
taining fearless and practical articles for the
benefit of the fieldworker, The Independent
should have a hearty support from all agents.
B. V. Hubbard,
Manager, Provident Savings Life.



ILLINOIS STATE AGENCY



OF THE



Plaiattaii Llle Iprap hnm,

or NEW YORK.

. W. Corner Madison and Dearborn Streets,
: : : CHICAGO : : :

I desire to enter into contracts -with a number of energetic life
insurance workers, for Chicago and at good locations in thisState.

We have made radical improvements in our policy plans, and
have inaugurated a system of field work which will taaterially aid
an agent in closing business.

I particularly desire correspondence with life agents of clean rec-
ords, who seek an opportunity to come to Chicago and make money.

W. N. SATTLEY. MANAGER.

" Yout paper is Just what I have been looking for,'^
writes one of our recent subscribers.



Tne Gnicaoo Indeoendeni

-fH OCCUPIES ALONE A HIGH POSITION

*•". IN INSURANCE JOURNALISM.



It is the only journal solely devoted to legal-re-
serve life insurance and recognized by the
fieldworkers as their paper.

The Subscription Price is ^loo per Year in Advance.

THE CHICAGO INDEPENDENT,

323 HOME INSURANCE BUILDING, CHICAGO



VAUIAnLE Ol'lNIONS OF FIKLDWOKKKUS.

Chicago, March 18, 1891.
I have read your paper for the last two years
with a great deal of pleasure, and find it thor-
oughly alive to all insurance interests. The
Independent is a paper \vhich every insurance
agent should have access to.

W. Treese Smith,
Manager, Massachusetts Mutual Life.

Cincinnati, Ohio, March 11, 1891.

It affords me much pleasure to give expression
to my appreciation of the value of The Inde-
dependent as an able and reliable source of in-
formation and encouragement to the field worker
in life insurance.

In these days of journalistic mendicity and
mendacity, it is truly refreshing to find at least
one editor of an insurance journal whose opin-
ions are not for sale. I wish you the succes
you deserve. O. H. Heyroth,

General Agent, New England Mutual Life.

Detroit, Mich., March 17, 1891.
You are to be congratulated on having made
a decided success of the first life agent's journal.
It is wide-awake and reliable, with many valu-
able suggestions in every number.

I read it with profit and recommend it to
.agents who wish to keep up with the times.
M. I. Whitman,
State Agent, Mutual Benefit Life.






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YALUABLK OPINIONS OF FIELDWORKHRS.

Omaha, Neb., March 16, 1891.
I have been reading your spicy journal month
after month, and I am glad to note that you
shut your eyes to your advertising columns
when criticising the existing evils in life insur-
ance.

The fact that you give them nothing but truth,
and represent their interests, should elicit the
heart V support of all field workers.
W. J. Fischer,
General Agent, New England Mutual Life.



Milwaukee, Wis., March 11, 1891.
Your paper is just what I have been looking
for — one devoted solely to life insurance, and not
in the interest of some one company. It merits
the patronage of all interested in life insurance.
Charles B. Van Slyke,
Si;ate Agent, Mutual Benefit Life.



Polo, Ills., March 24, 1891.
As a journal devoted exclusively to life under-
writing, The Chicago Independent, in my

opinion, has no peer,

M. E. Schryver,

Sup't of Agents, Northern 111. & Wis., Union

Central Life



VALUABLE OPINIONS OF FIELDWORKEKS.

Des Moines, Iowa, March 18, 1891.
The position you take in the reform movement
certainly entitles you to the commendation of
all field workers who are in favor of bringing
the dignity of the profession to the standing
which properly belongs to it.

I heartily recommend your journal to all life
insurance w^orkers as the best.

T. F. McAvoY,
State Agent, Mutual Benefit Life.

Boone, Iowa, March 13, 1891,
The Independent: Oi/r paper, which believes
in reforms commencing at the top, and whose
motto is, " To kill a dog, don't cut off his tail."
The only genuine agents' paper in the field and
an invaluable aid for every insurance solicitor.
" Them's my sentiments."

OcE B. Jackman,
Gen'l District Agent, Northwestern Mutual Life.

Washington, Iowa, March 11, 1891.
Permit us to express our appreciation of your
journal. We regard The Chicago Independ-
ent as valuable to ourselves and all field workers,
containing items of interest handled in a concise
and forcible manner.

Graves .s: Lamphere,
General yVgents, New York Life.



VALUABLE OPINIONS OF FIELDWORKERS.

Lincoln, Neb., March 13, 1891.
Some months ago our assistant superintend-
ent, Mr. Allan Waters, advised me to subscribe
for The Independent. I did so, and am much
pleased with the paper. There is so much in the
average insurance journal that is of no interest
to a life insurance agent that all must appreci-
ate The Independent. It deserves liberal sup-
port. J. M. Edmiston,

State Agent, Union Central Life.



St. Paul, Minn., March 14, 1891.
In ni}^ judgment The Chicago Independent
publishes information of the most practical
value to life insurance agents, and I am sure my
office receives more benefitfor the dollar in vested


1

Online LibraryAmerican UniversityAmerican University Bulletin Catalog Issue: Graduate School and School of Political Sciences Announcements and Schedule (Volume 1933-1934) → online text (page 1 of 2)