Young Family Association.

Southern accent, Sept. 2000-Dec.. 2000 (Volume v.56, pt. 1) online

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Tiffany Harris -This!
character plays with r
intensity and is a forcl
lo contend with.

Ricky Schwarz-I've
said it once and I'll say
it again, this boy is a
human highlight reel.

Thuisday, October 26, 2000

Prosser's People

t people you might not know


Carin Orange ■ Senioi

nought I could actually fly

cents/young adults; Caj
f: Jerilyn: t

: "1 wsh the ing to myself

neover If you wen an action htn

ikes you cry - Judy; MacGyver's heroic

R o a d t r i p

-Free raffle (Ihat means free sluff)
-All college ages

-Beginner to expert
-Bring wfiat you fiave.. .yourself, a friend
luipment, no problem. We fiave tfie goods and knowledge to keep yoti safe.


.'iiKk.- K The Southern Accent


Help fund new dorm housing

pleted by next sctioo
ond Ihe T.1BC H.ll
,ion btins comptele

Your duty is to vote

Eyes and ears

ampus ihrough ihe eyes ami ears of a student

ly legacy ofnmbitious word

Is YOU. Want lo help?

Ellie's answers

pie! Currenlly, Ihei

ship credit. \Vhy Finding aj

Kennedy and
Johnsim began
civil righis far/

cftcclively a

; media. Of cour^-, Uiey be your first choice. Tliere

n't turn lo mylhicil dieti- m- others, most nolablcly

i lor help, although Ralph Nadi-r o( Ihe Green

aughi highly ot this you support, your choice

Letters to
the Editor

Kudos to online Accei

le only way to keep up to da

ight V<

Voting days

Early voting: Now tlirough November 2

General voting; November 7


ing Worships

Wanting Worships ed in Wright H

rs help find a solution.

c to have a Ellie will reply lo you

center, in umn. This column is direct

asn'l being office wlh a student cmplo)

med some- cc researchmg and answei

The Southern Accent
Editorial Advisory Board

Gore promises
victory at Nashvill

andidate Joseph U

me fundraiser at the WId ^°^'^ comp:

^orse Saloon. Gore thanked ■>>■ ■>'•" '» " '

;ncouraaed Ihem lo J^tTin "^^'^ •'a/' h"-' P

jore said^ refe?rii^^to"lh'e '^""•^ *'^* '

liffererice between him and ^'"cee. Celeb

Jidate George W. Bush, '^ R^y Cyrus and^ PaW

Campus, world events The library is NOT your own love nest
to be commended ,Jce""h"™'c™;uf» r,:s,™o".don™™.S;: rfrS'^a^S'^c.:';!:!! XTf".:f°LT»'°d

) inform
Ind solve

particular a

being a member, wt
Bicycle Fleel (a te
great use around c

the Middle

For pity's s


u think Ihat maybe you

At first I thought thai

they started talking and

place to study? I hope that as

against the U.S.S.


C- ^ ,

sucking face in intervals. It

cert^ people spend more

il was refueUng in
Over 30 other


ing to study. 1 finally could-

they will MATURE some.

the United sJles is

moment I thought things

-^ , ^^


nest. Kindly keep it to your

g the Middle East.

they weren't giggling any-

asking Ilicm to al least keep

s stationed abroad

more. To be quite honest, 1


Te" to Jtti'S'At'le'itX'y



ferred the incessant gig-


"''A'"«hite""*», our

JaneSe is a senior com-


smacking/sucking sounds

eaten for lunch was threa

puter ^/sterns administra-
tion major Jwm Tennessee.

s October 16, 2000,

ing out in the depths of the

ening to was m

along out of the library

Sie credits Sie iedmohg;/

ph Nader, perhaps

slacks. I picked up a book.

lands over my ears. Didn

much to the delight of e very-
other people who actually

section qfOieAccetH

1 Dolson

The deviPs day is coming

tunica was installed as

editor. Only then cQi

Dejan Pujic or Marko

from which every

and rfrcnter the eom-

by the students of

Vhile pobtical stability is

Dave is a sent

yed here in the United


Is there an issue that you feel strongly

about it? Want to write about it? Send

your submissions to

[email protected]

Don't believe everything candidates say in political campaigns

chagUmpse of what both


ns ranged from outrage to
ghter to outright, well,

these Ihings an


eptical of both parlies, 1
nsider myself objecUve,

is a sampling
have gathered:



ler be expected to sift
rough the barrage of num-


do NOT beUeve every-




e direction for where h

' Thimday, October 26, 2000

How to loose patience with every tiling

1 dermitely thing. Then




iUSEH """



iking devi(

odisap- DESK WORKE"
of ques- apparently he used

cafeteria knife paid.S

uckin h

hrough I

Rules of the Air

1. Every take off is optional. Every landing is manditory.

2. If you push the stick forward, the houses get bigger,
tf you pull the stick back, they get smaller. That is
unless you keep pulling the stick all the way back; then
they all get bigger again.

3. Flying isn't dangerous. Crashing is.

4. Helicopters can't fly; they're just so ugly the earth
repels them.

5. The ONLY time you have too much fuel is when
you're on fire.

6. The propeller is just a big fan in front of the plane
used to keep the pilot cool. When it stops, you can see
the pilot sweating.

V. A 'good' landing is one firom which you can walk away.
A 'great' landing is one after which they can use the
plane again.

8. The probability of survival is inversely proportional to
the angle of arrival. Large angle of arrival, small proba-
bility of survival and vice versa.

9. Stay out of the clouds. The silver lining everyone
keeps talking about might be another airplane going in
the opposite direction.

10. Always ti-y to keep the number of landings you make
equal to the number of take offs you've made.


wildlife is advising hik-
ers, hunters, fishers
and golfers to take
extra precaution and
keep alert for alliga-
tors while in Osceola,
Polk, Brevard and
Orange County, They
advise people to wear

devices such as little
bells on their clothing
to alert but not startle

Answering machine message!

Compiled by Joe LaCom

10 Hi I'm probably home, I'm just avoiding someone I don't like,
so leave a message and then if I don't call back if s you.

9. Hello, you are talking to a machine. I am capable of receiving
messages, my owners do not need new cred. cards, _
cookbooks, and/or affordable insurance at a low low price.

8 Hi this is John. If you are a phone company. I already sent the
money; if you are my parents, please send money, rf you are
my financial aid institution, you didn't lend enough money; rf
you are my friends, you owe me money; if you are a female,
I have plenty of money

7. Please leave a message. However, you have the nght to remain
silent Everything you say can and wiU be recorded and
used by us. , . ■ u- r^ t

6. Hi. John's answering machine is broken, this is his retngerator.
Please speak very slowly, and Til stick your message to
myself with one of these magnets.

5. Hello, I'm John's answering machine.... what are you?

4*. Hi. this is John. I'm sorry I can't come to the phone right now.
Leave a message and then wait by your phone until I call

3. This is not an answering machine. This is a telepathic thought

recording device. After the tone, think about your name, yoiir|
number and your reason for calling, and I'll think about
returning your call.

2. If you are a burglar, then we're probably at home cleaning oiir
weapons right now and can't come to the phone. Otherwise,
we probably aren't home and it's safe to leave a message.
i, now you say something.

pectedly. They also
advise the carrying of
pepper spray in case of

alligator. It is also a
good idea to watch (or
fresh signs of alligator
activity. People should
recognize the differ-
between small
young, alligator and
large, adult alligator
droppings. Young alli-
gator droppings

Kids answers to all of
life's questions

Thursday, November 1

, 2000

Vol. 56 No.8

Election 2000 _


H„«Jidst„de„B,=art m

ill ■Jm^'^^r

i 1 Read about what some

1(1 an unoftkial do)1 H

TiiVviuUuM .'

'^ students did during a

taken about the presi- ■
denial election? H

gm Halloween costume


25 PAGE 11


Read about Jan
Haluska's trip from the
anny to the classroom.

Tk Southern Ai

Political Beer by the drink law up at next commission meeting

debate to be

held tonight ^lIl^HrcTcoS r™S™Vrci'T. ;r»c."itoii"

irn Gaza Strip, hospital


otDghtinghave left 147


lURMANSK, Rusaifl

iussian naval officials




By Cady Van Dolsor

l8ol a fnrlhtr search of

H But others alleged
M searching the front of

mpH B"reHe"vTio"

Henry Hicks, executive
director of Information Sys-
tems, attended Tuesday's


'""day will be partly
k^a high Df'n^H

J™' «^" high off 77

asked were related to prob-
lems with the phone system.

paid long-distance phone
the Information Systems

our telephone system is
designed to use," Hicks



-TTiafs why we can't
make a bunch of 1-800 lines


Virus infects many
faculty computers

his brother, Bueklee; his sis-
ter. Fawna: Keith WiUley;
Bryan Vyhmeister; Jep
Calkins and Jenny Harlow.

Eller explained that a fire-

Contact the Accent

The Southern Accent

P.O. Box 370

Collegedak, Tenn. 37315

(423) 238-2721

http://acceiH, southern. cdu

[email protected]

About the Accent

perform at gym clinil

Southern holds
Fall Festival

FamUy Theatre Workshop presents

"Twelve Angry Jurors."

Performances will be held November 2-4 and Noveml

7-1 lin the Community Theatre at Memorial AuditoriJ

at 7:30 p.m.

Student tickets are $6.50 and group discounts are av|


For more information, call 825-5553.

t v.-as designMi
;t logelher and

Don't miss tonight's debate with
the Republican and Democrat
clubs at 7:00 in Lynn Wood Hall,
Tom Griscom, executive editor of
the Chattanooga Times and
Chattanooga Free Press will be

the moderator.
Convocation credit will be given.


Check out our Phone Card.


Check our card against ttie ones you buy at

Walraart, Drug Stores, Convenience Stores,

Office Max and even Cell Plionc Deals,


2000 Minutes for $20.00
1000 Minutes for $10.00

YAK ATTACK reduction!

Call now! 423-559-3112

Thursday, November 2, 2000

The X Factor

|who are you planning to vote for in Which party are you affiliated
the presidential elections? with?

Your internet connection to the action


if America - www. coll egeder

ic National Committee (DNC) -

npaign Committee (DCCC) -
il (DLC) ■ www.ndol.orB


icialParh Site

■ertarian Party of Tennessee ■

eriarian Party Archives -

; Uberlarianism FAQ - www.tuxedo.orH/-esr/faqs/lib<


e (NRSC) - \^-ww,nra

|fopuBlicali National Committee CKNCl - w

alpuhS Con^E^e'LiondammiHeelNRCC) -

CounW Republican Party -

in Presidential Task Force -

le^GOP Information Network -



Sample Ballot


'Joe Lieberman (Democratic Party) - wwwjyGore3000.c(
V. Bush / Dick Cheney {Republican Party) - www.georgei
:athy Gordon Brown / Sabrina R, Allen (Independc ■'

n Party) - www.hagelin.oi

Democratic Party) - www.clark

One "Wrile.ln" Option for Stale Repre

Answer. Ralph Nader

the Green Party pre'



the Libertarian Part}

presidentia] c


the Reform Party pr



Answer: Pat Buchanai

US "Do you know wh

(he RepubUcan Part-

presidential c



S^ -Did you watch ar




arly vice-presidential candidate is

Tlo the political views of your family influence

#17 ■ "Do tlie political vi

Political quotations

i to be decided, perhaps the best tiii
, so the whole cosily and complia

-He who lakes the oath loday to preserve, protect. Mid uctena uit
tiled Slates only assumes the solumn obligation which ci'ery pain o
are tfrtUi him . f . Your every voter, as surely as your Chief Magislr
eh sanction, lliough in a different sphere. exereisM a Pyl"'"^ "^^^
Gnrv-er Cleveland, in his inagural address, March 4, 1885

Webster says in Napster debate, arlsts against

^^=sr^ .;;,i"rr;r.s: ™ss.r- piracy lobby for musicians

«s since J

t"" liX (ortr^saipTof the

site docs a good job spelling

wants to do. bul the only

' '' labeled "WlierelliPy Stand'

problem is knowing the

^'^}. side companson of ihe can-

ihL- issiii's

lo '^^^^ posiuon

Bush hasasearch feature ai

cd in [he

^s' www.alBore2000.cora

where you can search

■^.' George W, Bush insists

Ihrough the news, issues, or


"l'"' Eri^l^ndMTnslhe

Quaylc. skip this user-

Z J^;^^; '^^^ 'Si" he'tad?

only gel frustrated and won-

'''^- BusSh^dsdot!i%henU

anylhing. Instead, scroll

'''*^ comes to tasy access lo

you see a box highlighted in

- Christina Aguilera Is mad. do withi

Napster signifies a need not

the battle about the need for i
sa-conglom- the singles market i

stofthe gettingmusii

line believe they'll be more
mercially successful do
you for themselves.

;r-to-peer file pletely free

digital files? I d

ne insists major label consume

1 are faring a dilemma simply b

off each record's sales, sumera t
is pirated

before they buy it- way that doesn'

Stone says it's time lo lei artists of reveni

the online file-sharing com- seal at the negoti

panies know that ihe lasl Ultimately, he saj

are the artists themselves. ing it for free. And ihi

slowly resizing the Web is doesn't want an

r and other
labels don't

Hundreds camp out to await
release of PlayStation II

Profs crack computer code meant to
protect online music files

Jll 11

challenging people to

bypass four watermarking

Ihe^holiday season dr^ws


marking shields on down-

all^h"ad'^sl'lT«2 Set So

loadable music samples

without damaging the origi-

money people will be willing

copyrighl marks for record

so that the hidden signals, interested i

But monetary gains

ity professors, three gnidu-

ing MPJJisfribution giants

the so-called 'watermarks.' dialogue by

tlie money Uiough," he

oagues at Rice responded to
a challenge issued Sept. 6 by

scrambling lo develop lech-
nology that would tighten

University computer science "One, it
professor and spokesman ing techni

argued. "1 want it because it

ncluding Sony, Universal,

the technology in digital

electrical engineering pro- Two, we (ei

Best a nd worst of the wel

lp://.™^.poUOc,.com ™J;,f^^',

The Technology section is look-
ing for writers. Please email
[email protected],
[email protected]
or call 2721.

graphs describing the!

^d, ihey have loo much

many gutteral

K. Diech, and little "coi^ur area.
In,., w , Its not a ghasUy !

1 put Minolta just a really boring sil

londay conversation with Demetrius Birch




bbath. I came to 1 just didn't like (Barry)
n with the inlention Switzer. past head coach of

people in

llympics. I plai



ming a pastor, but Oklahoma Univereily; 1 like
hings changed when the way Nebraska plays foot-




here. Now I'm just ball, how confident they are,
oing to school, and and their power running



e£r% """^ Things overheard during the World Series

n football this year n't like

By Rob York

) play foolbali. but I

1^ teci'"o^f£orthSj'don-i ''°- "^^^ ^'^ '^®^® 9^y^ ^^3' 'he Cardinals?"

ear like the referees. So maybe 9. "I'm not watching it. I hale New Yofk. Uhm, what's the

lod they should gel a team sCOre?"
ost together, and maybe travel- , ,

ihe ing. like a basketball leam or 8. I wonder how the TV receptioH is in Atlanta."

'S, YkT^T^N T f'°l^vi '"^f ^- "°^ ^°^^ °"' " ^^® °"'y 3" ^S ^^^ s'ider! I could've hit

ir^ course. ' that!"

.n? wh«*?s*^''oi?'^rt^d'4o ^" ' ^^^^ ^^^^ ^ Yankees fan my whole life! No, I don't know

"is tiine? ^ ^^"^ " who Joe DiMagglo is."

5. "Can we please stop seeing shots of Jeter?"
4. "I'm sure glad Bob Costas isn't announcing anymore."
3. "I stopped studying for that World Civ exam for this?"
2. "Where did all these Cardinals fans come from, anyway?"
1 . "Maybe this wouldn't be a good time to talk to Negron
about worship requirements."

ly not look like it

ame updates: Football in review

iy Morgan Hochenower

■s. Hamilton,
suplc 'limes,

n Ted Struntz. Nudd Tried a last

who helped Key shawn John

r first place position b

upper diwsion playoffs

un from Br

light, and Lemon agai

their quarterback. Rob




played aggressively and

13-6. Jo

nson got t

e length o;


without a deep safety. Stuart
had a good night at quarter-



T Nudd's next game is


against Hamilton (M) who

The Saints played intimi

[S also coming off a loss. Slu-

arl (3-2) plays Watson (4-1)

e night

calls that went agains

I Uiouglil DeGrave just


"enSe^" '


might get a wining steak


on (2-3) pi.


Barnelt who is

1-2 Miller. Miller the length o

" (!-3) plays

s NfVP, played witii

Crystal Edmisler

■e (1-3) plays play because ICi
!-l) next, and it don't want lo r

The RA's played s

fundamental fool
Monte "Shaft- I

Accent doesn't
endorse candidate

Worship system

Letters to the Editoi

Newspaper underappreciated poUing transportation Unfail

Hall, checking o

_ ,, .|i • . • islered already in Tennessee someoneelse toput ilthere. voice your opinion you t

Library will maintain °z.°'7,2TXl'Zi 1^;^.?.™"!!.°"! ""S'li*™" h
atmosphere for study I

The Southern Accent

Ellie's answers

making. Bui read The Jungle" by Upton call. You o

Drivers can take whomevei
they please to the polls

1 that the adverdser the right to dt
blican and wants to pleases. At h

iil~ Eyes and ear j

Id place il in the brass mail- ^

xM healed in Wright Hall Causing casual anarchy and governnmilal awaremess on Southern's i

reply to it in a weekly CO

is nostalgic Z„^V

painting of His love Long live the republic!

n close. 1 don't ^H^ with lear-slained cheeks and

ry lines with ^^^^B Janelle the pain of the world deep in
sso or even ^^^^V Chang his eyes. His shoulder are

take a look at ^^^^^^^P dcncd. And his hands

; recognizable ,__^ His once youthful-looking

rtonly equipped with skills pie-blossomed
lugh to make f^'O'^^S unnoUi
k figures witli we walkway. Tti

like to transtorn

into a paint hi

^er into canvas

ectives into aery

personality, appc
bobbing its head
ly. lis petals 1

only one way (o

ss^ —

wasting taxpayers money on




failed Soda! Security ven-


1 am voUng for Bush
because he will return honor



and integrity to the Office of

vole" option, if yoi

the Presidency, white the

ies. Uw ,


dates, or the platfon

And while we ar

subject this is mj

because he will honor Amer-


1. World War U or

for m the presiden

al elec-

quibble before foreign pow-


ark that only fow^r with his hand
urdy-bristled pa">t an angel. He's waiting

r path. Your schedule.

junseling through yi
touch. He could do

ortunately, tha

t the

1. But perhaps when Tm beauty
won't find that ca'ch i
e quite so ordi- "^^ by. Slop. Pli


icle. And


ig. Peaceful-

stretched towari

^hild !(eeps reaching

enes sioreu ui iiiy and to you her giggle is
itiently waitmg to bewildering. Wth the color


political opponents, whil

fully work if



in poUtical bickering.
Finally, I am voting fo

ence. By do

<l.y, Novem

slitutional rights fincluding
the right to bear arms),
while the other candidate

their government, while th

enjoyed by iJ


stands for violating one of

government and its incftec

mass conmu

iicaliBHS m

Stoves and bowling balls

^Binf„... .



e wors

thing I have

own Alth

am glad


not only in





met Ruth,
thankful ti



^V> signs

get a

emy s

love others


lave an opinion about something on campus
>r in the Accent? Want to write about it? Send
your submissions to [email protected]

Come & meet singer, songwriter, and author

Michael Card

Friday, November 3 at 2 p.m.

Autographing his latest project. Soul Anchor

CD $13.97 Cassette $8.97

220 Hamilton Place Blvd.

T iff^A/^V Chattanooga, TN 37421

iiillftfiAlf stork/- (423)893-4290

Haluska's trip from
army to teaching

God created th<
Sabbath for res


Bread for the hungry:
A student mission story

myself in E^^gue. Iknov

re barely capable of opei
when [ glanced al Ih

e. It was 730. Immediate-
ry body wnl mto the 'I

icTser'lo God 'aiiVhofleMy Ji^^vo^bo'sfT^/V ^1 °" '^"'"^ ^°^^- st^l

ave really nice sludents [''EK.'nE^roughlhe trash, amount of food. !

:hlng English isn't as "*°'"'^ I"'' ''""'■ ^ '*"'"fih> ' about how often wc

. [ thoughl it wouid I"^^ ^."'"^ '" °^^^ '"10 granled what we hw

I thought that I would r,^ -" "^ ^ ^^- • P^n- forget about th

thai really touched me. w *i jrd'' ' ^'^^ 8^*«^<="'-'s ' Ju^f. "'oufi'" l^

At one point the parent.s really touched

f LATE" convuWons. You wife and daughter did as * Yuuknow we tend to put ^™'^ " ° ^^* ^^^''
- gioH columhist.

If you would like to write for the religion section, please email
[email protected]


ren. They repeatedly said miss you guys!
efore 1 really did be^ w>

rluusday, No\'cml)er 9, 2000

Election 2000

How did people in

Vol. 56 No.y

Read aboul how some
sludcnls spend ihtir
nights, cither studying,
working or socializing.


Check out the
newest single guy of



*Erekat, tile chief Pales-

I Gaza Snip. "We want U
Isday. Israel's nav]

P^fDON — Sun
I'ave coniplet

I Two women and t

b marched in R

pblics Tuesday

CoUegedale rejects beer law ordinance

iegedale Commission voted
thai would have allowed on-
cadng establishments buiit

Justin Carris, a sopho-

: safely slon Jones confirmed thai in this eommun

erved in "We are a Chrisdan com- ity lo impose our i
Id make munity," Holuska said, "and because we have {

"We are in charge of

mostly elderly
lamented their
I political clout

ind would English, favored ihe ordi-

Fire returns to Biology Trail

Fire Marshall closes trail as blaze burns for eight days

1 2 3 4 6 8 9 10

Online LibraryYoung Family AssociationSouthern accent, Sept. 2000-Dec.. 2000 (Volume v.56, pt. 1) → online text (page 6 of 10)